ASHLEY

49

   It's been two weeks since the robbery and too be completely honest I haven't been able to sleep because I'm scared senseless. The whole situation is completely foreign to me. The fact that they weren't there for me at all-but in fact looking for Kenneth-I haven't been able to look him in the eyes since. How could anyone after going through something as traumatic as that? If I were to be found that night who knows what those men could have done to me. The possibilities are endless.

   Thank Jesus no one else had stayed home with me.

   "Would you like some help?" The thin woman sitting behind the desk pulls me from my thoughts as she makes her way over to me.

   I shake my head vigorously. "No ma'am-well...yes. I'm looking for this book I have to read for my English class-"

   "Senior."

   "I know just what you're looking for. All of the juniors an seniors have been rushing over trying to get their hands on these books. We've had to order so many copies. I thought you kids forgot what libraries were. Everything's so digital. I hate it." My eyes travel to the newest model iPhone in her pocket and the men shuffling in with newer model computers yet I saw nothing snarky at the irony.

   The trail looking woman who's nametag reads Sheila. Sheila has been working here for nearly five months and in that time-and between me coming to the library often-this is the first time she's spoken to me. Not that it really mattered. Searching for books to read for entertainment is usually something done alone anyway.

   A new order of The Uglies are stacked high on a rack nearby. Sheila sticks a barcode on one of the copies and ring it up under my name after receiving the black library card. "All set. Anything else?"

   "No ma'am. I think I'm going to have a seat at those desk and start reading as much as I can before I get home. My little sister is very loud," I admit to the stranger.

   Her thin, red lips stretch into a smile. "No problem. Just be weary of the time. We close at 7:30 tonight." That leaves approximately thirty minutes. Enough time to feel the story out and get a pretty good head start. Wouldn't be surprised if I'm the only one in my class to actually read it. Not too many people are here at this time which makes it easier to read a few pages. So far it's pretty good but nothing that would have been picked out if it weren't for this assignment.

   The buzzer goes off and a woman's frail voice cracks through the intercom, "the library is now closing. Please exit the building. The library is now closing. Please exit the building."

   One peak out of those double glass doors sends irritation throughout me. A group of no less than ten boys are crowded around the area. The woman at the desk gives another warning. No sense in delaying it. I adjust my sweater before walking out.

   "Damn," someone mumbles.

   "Fat ass,"

   I hold my head down and clutch the book closer to my chest. The whispering keeps coming. Only thing to do now is keep moving. That is, of course, until one of the guys form a vice like grip on my wrist. "What's up ma?" He licks his lips, eyes gazing over my body.

   "Nothing much unless you don't get your hands off of me."

   "Man you don't have to come over here with all that attitude before I have to put you in check," he says but let go anyway.

   "Put me in check then." Oh crap! I did not mean to say that. Well I did, just not out loud. So doubt he's going to feel like his ego is being attacked and with all his friends here, the need to prove himself. Ugh, why do boys like him have such huge alter egos? His eyes become set on me, determination clear. I scan the area looking for any way out of this. His friends obviously aren't going to help. If anything they'll only encourage him.

   I continue scanning the area until I spot something that catch my eye-or rather someone, "Kenneth?" His tall frame stands off to the side with his hands stuffed in his pockets. Has wearing all black with a familiar gold chain hanging around his neck. The lights from overhead shines directly on it. A man dressed in a simple pair of jeans and a white shirt approaches him. The two dap hands and part ways. My mouth involuntarily flies open. They may have thought they were slick but as someone that's very familiar with how "they" do things I'm able to figure it all out.

   "How you know my boy?" The guy that grabbed me ask.

   I suddenly remember where I am and the altercation that was about to happen as an attempt for the guy to smooth over his gigantic alter ego. I blink twice before responding. "We go way back," and with that I'm flying down the rest of the stairs. When I reach Kenneth his eyes are wide open and his lips form words but nothing comes out. "What the hell are you doing here?"

   "Hanging out. Why are you coming at me like it's any of your business?"

   "Do not play with me, Ken. I just saw you," by the end of my sentence my voice begins to crack as tears swell up. His denial is guy wrenching. He's been lying all this time and even after being caught he still continues to deny everything. This is unbelievable.

   "You need to chill out. You didn't see anything."

   "Kenneth-"

   "You didn't see nothing, Bria. Stop acting like that."

   I wipe at the tears threatening to spill out. With a simple nod and a "okay," I turn on my heels and head in the opposite direction. No sense in standing around being lied to. A vice like grip forms in my wrist and I'm yanked into a hard chest. I wrestle against Kenneth's grip. "Let me go!"

   "Bria calm down."

   "Don't tell me to calm down you dope boy. You sell dope to people. You sell crack too? You turning people's mother and father into crack heads? Putting that shit into our community-"

   Kenneth lets go of me as if I'd all of a sudden contracted some contagious disease. A look back at the boys crowded around the steps reveal that they have gone back to their conversation. A thick white girl walks by and that grabs the boys attention. I turn back to Kenneth. "You think you got everything figured out but you don't. You walk around like you're better than the rest of us-"

   "I don't think that. I have the right to be mad at you for selling so dont turn it around and make this about me," I bark.

   "Everything is about you! The rest of us...see this is why I didn't want to tell you. I knew you would act like this," Kenneth slumps against the brick wall of the building rubbing the top of his bald head. He looks so defeated. So vulnerable in this moment.

   I've never seen him like this and it scares me.

   So so so extremely sorry for the delay. I just haven't been feeling it and on top of that I was sick. But on another note I think this story is almost coming to an end. Yay!