ASHLEY

38

   My glossy lips stretch into a smile. I rub the areas where my freckles are located. Since I'm not wearing any makeup their on full display. I put the joint to my lips and take another long drag. Welcoming the calm feeling it gives me in return.

   I needed this. I needed to relax. My week has been so stressful between school, work, dealing with the girls. Oh right, you don't know. Well the girls have been pissed at me because they found out about Kenneth's party that they weren't invited to. Apparently someone posted a video with me in it on their Snapchat. Not to mention I was in a lot of pictures.

   Kayla was hurt most of all. She was really rooting for me to not go to that party and stay away from Kenneth. I tried to tell her it was nothing serious but she doesn't believe me and thinks I'm neglecting her to spend more time with a guy that disappeared on me than the girl that stayed and picked up the pieces. Well I'm not abandoning her. I haven't forsaken her and I never will. Kayla is my best friend. Kenneth isn't anymore.

   I tried to explain this to her too but she thinks with Kenneth back in the picture it's going to be just how it was when we were kids; me and Kenneth excluding her of most of our adventures and forming life long secrets with each other that we wouldn't dare tell Kayla. We were kids then. I was sort of a tomboy. Of course I wanted to hang out with Kenneth more than her.

   I pass the joint off and wait anxiously for it to return to me. "Don't smoke it all."

   "It's nine so I don't see why not."

   I prop myself up on my elbows. "You invited me over here just so you can smoke most of it?"

   "Pretty much," Kenneth shrugs. I roll my eyes and lay back down on the floor. Okay, I know what you're thinking. Don't judge me. I came over here to tell Kenneth about the problems I was having with Kayla and how Isaiah and I got into a fight because I came to his little party the other day. Only when he opened the door and a carefree smile formed on his face when he saw it was me, I smiled back and asked if he had any more weed instead. I don't know why but when I saw how relaxed he was and spelled the scent of it on his clothes I had to ask.

   I'm putting myself in so much trouble being here but with the help of the weed I'm able to relax and not worry so much about Kayla or anyone else finding out about this.

   I roll over and begin tracing the tattoos on his bare chest. "Who would have thought we would have been the ones to go and get all this ink?"

   "We were some weird ass kids in middle school. Now we both fine as hell," he says cockily while popping his imaginary colar.

   "Hell yeah. It was just us against the world."

   He place a hand over mine. "It still is. We're going to overcome this little buno in the road. We've always been best friends and I know this is only going to make our relastionship stronger."

   "People say I shouldn't be around you. Should I? I mean, I can't even tell my family about you because I know they'll freak out like Kayla did-"

   "So you going to listen to them? Bri they don't know shit about me. You do. You know who I really am despite whether you think you do or not. You do," his voice becomes harsh.

   "Isaiah said he loves me," I admit, desperate for a change of topic and to tell him.

   He's silent for a while before speaking. "Who wouldn't? You are an amazing person Bri. I'm not surprised that he said that."

   Silence.

   "Do you love him back?" Kenneth finally works up the nerve to ask.

   I remove my hand from his chest and close my eyes as I think about his question. A question I have been asking myself since Isaiah told me he loves me. Isaiah is different from other guys. He's the type of guy I can get caught having over and instead of being scolded he's invited to breakfast. Had it have been any other guy Aunt Jackie would have gone ballistic.

   She likes him and the way he is with me. She says it's good to have someone like him in my life. Kayla like him as well, far better than she like Kenneth. Stephanie and Lira think we're going to get married one day and be a power couple. Of course Erica shut that down and told them to grow up. She also told Kayla that it's a shame she's grilling me about hanging out with Kenneth when she's still talking to Tony after we begged her not to. Now Tony, he's no good. He's the type of guy that is destined to go nowhere in life. He already dropped out of school his snenior year which by the way made absolutely no sense. Of you make it to your senior year I don't see any reason why you should drop out. You have already made it to the finish line. You just have to push through and cross it. Tony wouldn't understand.

   Kayla can do way better than keep running back to him and then crying on our shoulders when he does her wrong. She deserves a guy like Isaiah. She could live him the way a guy like that needs to be loved.

   I shrug. "I don't know yet. I just know I care about him a lot. I can't say if it's love. I wouldn't know what that kind of love feels like."

   "That kind of love is stable, it's your safe place to land. That kind of love is the type of love you don't have to question."

   I stare up at the ceiling as I listen to his words. How is it he knows so much about love? Must of been watching too much Lifetime.