The Only Hope For Me Is You ~ Phan

t h i r t e e n

Trigger Warning

Louise was supposed over the next morning. I had the house to myself, and sitting alone in my room moping around wasn't going to do anything.

I bet I would explain everything to her when she got here.

When I heard he doorbell ring, I had never gotten to the door faster, and I could already feel the tears welling up in my eyes, even though I had already been crying all morning.

"Dan!" She exclaimed when she saw me, but her face fell when she saw the expression on my face. "Oh, honey." She pulled me into a hug, holding me securely in her arms, where I choked back tears against her shoulder.

She lead me into the lounge, where we sat in the sofa. I had my head laying in her lap, and she played with my hair as I cried.

It felt like I was crying for so long.

But I really had no reason to be acting like this, I mean, we were basically just friends with benefits.

But that sounded like a dirty way of putting it. Because Phil and I definitely were not friends with benefits, even though that was the only way to really put out relationship.

And yeah, everyone knew about it. Phil wouldn't treat me any different than when we were with friends, or alone. (Minus the whole sucking-face and having-sex part.) Nobody seemed to be against it. Monday was going to be the actual worst day ever.

How were we going to tell everyone? Will things be different? Yes, everything is going to be different.

I regret the decision I made. I wish I had just made my family deal with my relationship with Phil, and not ran away from it. Because it was killing me. Everything reminded me of last night.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Louise asked. I had a feeling she already knew what happened. Like she had a sense at why I was crying. But I had to tell her anyway. I took a deep breath, looking up at her.

"I had sex with Phil last night."

She jumped up, making me fall to the floor of the couch.

"What?!" She yelled. Her eyes were wide, and her eyebrows were raised.

"And I ended things." I hid my face in the cushions., not wanting to see the reaction it gave her.

"Oh, Dan." She sat down next to me, placing a hand on my back. "Penny told me." She said after a minute of silence.

"What?" I sat up, wiping my face.

"She said Phil came home crying and told her what happened, but, I guess not the whole 'having sex' part. She would have told me if Phil said anything." She paused. "Why did you guys do it? If you knew you were going to end things, why did you lead him o-"

"I did it before. We just, I don't know. I told him, and then, he was kinda okay, but I wasn't, and then he kissed me again, and then it just escalated, and we didn't stop ourselves. I didn't lead him on." I wiped the final tear off my cheek, bringing my knees to my chest.

"How was it?"

"Louise!"

She laughed, wrapping an arm around me.