The Only Hope For Me Is You ~ Phan

t w e n t y

"So what's the deal with you and Phil?"

I looked up to Millie, who was staring me down. Her lips formed into a smirk, as she looked up to me over her glasses. She still had her English book open with her notebook balanced on her thigh, but it was like she set this question up.

"What do you mean?" Was all I could say. I turned my attention back to my book, continuing to write my vocabulary words and definitions down, coming up with sentences for each word. Millie's state however, was still distracting me in my peripheral.

"You know what I mean, smart ass." She finally closed her book to show that she wasn't giving up on this, but I couldn't betray Phil like that, and tell her. I didn't want to, anyway.

"I actually don't." I tried to keep my best poker face. I was a pretty good liar, so it wouldn't take much to convince someone as gullible as Millie.

Millie had fallen for a lot of our pranks, because she's the easiest to prank. A month ago, or something, we told her we were throwing a surprise party for Jackson and she decorated his entire basement, forgetting his birthday was actually in October. And then when he showed up she yelled a him to leave because everyone showed up an hour later than we said we would. Funny shit.

"C'mon, Dan. Everyone sees it, so I have no idea what you're thinking."

I knew this tactic of hers, because she used it all the time. She'd trick us into thinking everyone already knew it, so we'd confess anyway, because it wouldn't matter. Wrong, is was just a trick she had to use against us.

"What the fuck are you saying, Mills?" I got defensive quick, seeing if she'd just drop it. But I could tell she wasn't going to.

"You know, the looks, the touching, what the hell? Didn't you guys like, fall through, or something?" She scooted closer to me on the floor of my bedroom, I tapped the back of my pen on the book in my lap.

"Were just, just, close." We did get in a big fight but everything is okay now. We did fall through but that doesn't mean we can't be friends."

"I call bullshit."

I rolled my eyes, trying to focus on my homework. But Millie wasn't having it. I could feel her stare on me anytime I looked down at my page, she saw right through me.

"Tell me."

"God fucking damnit, Millie!" I snapped, closing my book. She wasn't offended, however. Her smile just turned dark, like she had finally cracked me. "Why can't you just fucking accept that Phil and I are platonic?"

It was her turn to roll her eyes. I don't know why she was so persistent on me telling her what was going on. It's not like I didn't want to tell her, fuck, I wanted to tell the world that Phil and I were having constant sex, because have you seen Phil? He's the most attractive person I've laid eyes on, and that's true for a lot of people. "I know you're lying to me." She poked my wheel, right where my dimple would lay if I was smiling.

"Okay?" I tried to brush her off, but I could tell it wasn't going to work.

"How come you never tell me things?" She said, and her tone had changed drastically, like she was legitimately upset. She flopped so she was sitting against by bed.

"What do you mean? I talk to you every day."

"But you never, I don't know, talk talk to me. You never tell me anything that's going on, like you do with Lou and Laney." She could have probably bee putting on another act to get me to break, but I've never seen her like this. She's never genuinely been upset with me, and my heart swelled slightly. But I had to be cautious.

"Don't compare yourself to them, Mills-"

"I can't help it, though. People become friends with them so easily, and it takes so long for people to open up to me. I don't know."

I sighed, moving to sit next to her. I wrapped my arm round her, pulling her frame into my side. This wasn't an act, I could fucking tell. And now I actually felt like shit because she's right I don't talk to her like I do Laney and Louise. And that's awful of me.

"I just wish I wasn't a fucking year younger than you. I feel like that would make all the difference."

"Don't say that, Millie-"

"But you of all people know it's the fucking truth!"

"Well what do you want to hear? Everybody already knows everything I've told Laney and Louise. What else is there to know?" We were getting slightly heated, which I was trying to calm down before is spurred into something bigger. That's the least of what I need right now.

"I just want to hear something from you. Anything. God it's like you're an open book to everyone except me."

"Thats a fucking lie. I don't know where you got that idea from bu-"

"Alright fine! Just,- fuck, Dan. Forget I said anything. "

"How am I going to forget you said anything? You're obviously upset, so why would I just let you be upset? I'm not a monster, Millie." I scooted away, letting my hands fall to my sides.

She didn't say anything, just shook her head.

"Look, I'm not mad at you or anything, obviously. But maybe I would tell you more if you didn't always talk to other people about business that shouldn't be spread." I said. And yeah, it was a little harsh, but she needed to hear it.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, you always talk to the group about your other friends drama, and shit, when obviously they didn't want you to tell anyone. And you turned around after promising you wouldn't, and told us. Honestly if I tell you something, I wouldn't want you to go tell everyone."

Millie sighed, hanging her head.

"I don't mean to hurt you, I'm just telling you what nobody else has."

She nodded, and there was this pause, unsure of what to be said next. "I guess you're right." She eventually said. I give a small smile, while she returns it.

(A/N)

Two months without uploading she comes ba-

Okay I'm sorry but I literally have had such awful writers black lately :(

I've been writing oneshots on my tumblr though!!! If you'd like to read them my tumblr is metricanxiety so please go give me a follow !

Sorry for the awful chapter. Had to get something up.