Flam-BOY-yant (BoyxBoy)

I Like You - Caleb Edition

He stayed.

It honestly meant more to me than he knew.

I woke up before him this time. It was a little later in the day but the sun was still up. The sun crept through my blinds and left an imprint on us.

Ben had yellow lashes. It had taken me forever to notice them. He was so pale and they almost blended in with his skin. Ben was sporting another one of his dangerously low cut v-necks. Little blonde chest hairs were sprawled across his chest. Parallel horizontal shadows ran along down his body. He looked like an angel. My angel. I mean he wasn't mine necessarily but a little part of me hoped.

What did I do to be so lucky? My life had been anything but so far.

As much as I knew he probably wanted to stay, I couldn't let him stay for much longer. His mother was probably having a conniption now. I sat up and rested on my knees.

"Hey," I shook his shoulder.  

His eyes cracked open and an easy smile fell on his face. "Arent you sight for sore eyes?" He wiped his eyes with a hand. His arms stretched above him in a slow movement and he yawned.

"You should probably head home. Your mom-" He cut me off. 

"My mom is fine. I texted her yesterday and told her I would be home for dinner."

"It's 3 pm," I noted.

"Do you really want me gone so soon?" His hand wove into mine. For some unknown reason, I couldn't stand to be touched in that moment. It felt weird and a little tingly. I coughed awkwardly and removed my hand from his.  He sat up very slowly at this.

Ben cleared his throat, "You know what I'm just gonna say it." I knew this was gonna happen. I was such a mess...a big fucking mess. He had stayed with me and I couldn't even hold his hand. "I like you." A wad of spit got stuck inside my throat and I coughed again, but this time it was real.

"What!" My voice had gone up an octave. "I'm a fuck up and an idiot and I have panic attacks and really bad anxiety and-" Ben interrupted me way more than I liked.

"Despite what you think, I think that you are kind and understanding, and have a great ass," He stopped when  I let out a mix of a snort and a giggle. "and I just learned you have a unique laugh. Caleb, I like you a lot and if you don't want me now then that's fine and I could wait." Ben gave me a little more space as he propped himself on my headboard. 

"It's not that I don't want you." I clenched my eyes as tight as I could. "I just don't think I'm in the state where I could even allow you to like me or wait on me."

"Well how about we agree to keep things platonic. I won't consider this my rejection just yet, but just let me know if you are feeling differently in the near future."When I opened my eyes, he was looking down at my sheets. 

"You should move on from me now because you're wasting your time." It felt like I was whining now. He was just so stubborn.

Ben just had this huge smirk on his face.

"Think of it as weighing out my options."