Going Anyway

This Town

Tuesday, May 23

I had to be at the school early again this morning for a graduation meeting. In March, I was asked to give a speech at graduation. This is my first graduating class, and it's the highest graduation rate in this town ever. The majority of those students plan on attending college.

Wow.

I'm the kind of person who likes to put things off until the last minute when I know something is far away, and then this speech came along; I still haven't gotten around to writing it.

I'll do it tomorrow night. It's not going to be an overly long speech. I'll post it on Saturday for y'all to read.

Graduating was a big deal for me. My sister, Stacey, did not graduate. Stacey turned to drugs when she was only 15. Mom was sick and barely even noticed. I didn't want to be like my sister. I had to stay healthy to take care of Mom.

When I graduated, I was pretty much on my own because Stacey was never around, and Mom had died during my senior year. I went to basic training the summer before I graduated, and I was so ready to go to college, away from this town.

I remember hearing the music as my small class of 62 walked into the auditorium, and I remember thinking to myself There is no way I'm ever coming back to this town. And look what happened. I'm a teacher at the middle school.

Why me?

Now I am leaving in nine days, and honestly, I hope I don't ever have to move back here.

The job here isn't easy. These kids are crazy. A lot of teachers don't care here.

At least in Iowa people value education.

I don't even think people value life here.

This town is full of misanthropes.

I'm not saying everyone is this way, and I think we're moving in the right direction, but I'm ready to leave. I'm concerned about the future of this town, of this area. That's why it's been so hard lately.

There are so many bad things in this town. Drugs, poverty, lack of education, lack of law enforcement...

I'm praying more people will step up after I leave and encourage these students to not only graduate, but go on to college.

The issue is natural selection though. The people who get good jobs move out. No one who makes good money wants to live here.

Even I am moving out.

I almost feel like I'm graduating again because I feel like I've served my time here, and I deserve to go on to bigger and brighter things.

To end this on a positive note, I do love this town. It's like family: you may hate what they do, but you love them because they are part of you. I like how everyone knows each other here. I like how people are quick to come to the rescue if you are struggling. I have great neighbors who I will miss.

I am thankful for the opportunities this place has given me, but I'm disappointed in the pain this town had brought many of its people.

There is hope for the future. Graduation rates are higher than ever.