Book Reviews ↠ all types

Review 26 ↠ I Would

Title: I Would

Author: @LibbyGwen_xoxo

Genre: Fanfiction

Rating: 6.5

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Hi Elizabeth! Your book comes across as a bit… cliché? I don’t like to say that, because the description of I Would is anything but cliché, what with the cliff accident and all. Your introduction isn’t as strong as I would like to see for this book. It needs to draw people in and giving them an immediate, obvious taste of foreshadowing is a bit off-putting and cliché.

As for your cover, I’m not really a fan. The editing of Louis into the picture is good, but the girl looks squished and her head is cut off. I can’t make out the letters in your username, which makes it useless. The trees in the background are distracting and don’t really add much to the setting of the book. All in all, I think you could use a new cover-which I know you can do, since I have seen your cover magic!

Sentence structure and variation is something you might want to look into when you edit your story. In the first chapter alone there is a lot of repetitive structure and wording- see the example below. Also, when you use dialogue in your writing, try spacing/indenting between each piece of dialogue to help your readers read through easier. You seem to talk to the reader within parentheses. While it’s easier for you and faster for you to clarify things for your reader, it makes your writing more immature.

Example: Repetitive wording-

I picked out…

I put on…

I took a… 

Example: Dialogue spacing-

“I hate that you always do this to me! It’s ridiculous!” I scream, exasperated.

He rolled his eyes back at me, “Well I’m so sorry to disappoint!”

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Plot wise, your story is interesting. I wouldn’t say it’s compelling but it does keep the reader wanting more. I think the main thing I would suggest to you is changing up your wording style. That would definitely make a huge difference in how interested the reader is. Another suggestion: add a story description. It can help bring in more readers!

There isn’t much else I can suggest, as your plot is good. I rated your story as a 6.5 because it needs work but has places to go.  Please let me know what you think below and keep writing! Your book is rather interesting and has places to go. x