BLIND DATE. ❪ PJM + JJK ❫

twenty-six

there weren't many things you could find to distract yourself with in a room where you couldn't see nor hear anything but the indistinct murmur of conversation. 

trying to occupy his mind with thoughts to do with the colour black and how fascinatingly dark it was wasn't helping jeongguk much either. his head was starting to hurt at this point, thoughts and emotions practically destroying him from the inside as they swam around in a mad rushㅡrush to get where, to do what? all he needed was for them to settle down, for thirty goddamn minutes so he could get through this date alive, but apparently his own body had no mercy on him.

and oh, the guilt. it was clawing away at his insides, painfully reminding him of everything he didn't need on his mind at the present momentㅡhow he hadn't ran at jimin and screamed in his face that you don't understand, you're doing something to me you fucker! and hugged him and wished him luck back; had only looked away as well and almost dragged jaehyun into the dining area.

of course, it didn't help that every few seconds jaehyun would whisper from next to him with the same four words over and over againㅡ

"so you and jimin,"

"jaehyun i swear to jesus mary and joseph, i will personally escort you to the gates of hell if you start one more sentence with that."

"sir, if you'd just let me speakㅡ" jaehyun began desperatelyㅡif someone had interrupted jeongguk as many times as he'd interrupted jaehyun, he would have flipped and legitimately murdered, so he couldn't help but feel a tad impressed by jaehyun's stubbornness and patience when it came to the particular topic of so you and jimin. 

but impressed or not, "maybe i don't want to let you speak," jeongguk didn't have the time for this. "maybe i want silence to mull in my own sad thoughts, to question all my life decisions that brought me to this ugly point of which my mind has lost its sanity, its will to function properly, therefore i have lost my sanity and my will to function properly, and of course this all happens as i walk towards my first meeting with the girl i've liked sinceㅡ"

"sir, you're talking too much."

jeongguk's emotions flared even higher, "oh, i'm talking too much? the fucking nerve. are you paid to be this goddamn talkative, jaehyun? i think not, so how about youㅡ"

"excuse me, sir." jaehyun directed him slightly to the right, and jeongguk held in a growl, determined to feel annoyed at every little thing the waiter did. "i didn't mean to come off as rude with that, i only wanted to point out that you're a little ... jittery."

"i'm scared of the dark," jeongguk lied flatly, too tired to come up with a good excuse. "terrifies me. sometimes i wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, look around me for something domestic and comfortingㅡand all i see is never-ending blackness. it's truly horrifying jaehyun, the likes of you would never understand ㅡ"

"you're doing it again, sir," jaehyun pointed out delicately.

"yeah wellㅡjust shut up, jaehyun!"

"sir," jaehyun pleadedㅡjeongguk hissed in displeasure but didn't interrupt him for once. probably noticing this, jaehyun went on quickly, "i assumed that you and jimin would be discussing matters concerning the small... erm, mistake, and actions to be taken about that, butㅡ"

"believe me, my list of complaints for your manager is still very much there and it's only getting longer."

a nervous laugh. "you're so, haha, um, funny. my point isㅡyou seemed to be getting along almost ... well there, with him. hm."