Just Friends | Narry | Discontinued

twenty-five

AN: Update?

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I stood there on the porch, in the dark, for a long while.

I didn't move.

I only stared at the spot where Niall previously stood.

When I finally did move, I didn't make it far. I turned around took a few steps and stopped again. There was this weighing down on my chest, burning, in the exact same spot where Niall pushed.

I was lost.

I had no idea where to go from here.

There was no way things were ever gonna go back to the way they used to be. I know Louis said no hard feelings, but that didn't mean that he'd be alright with everything immediately. There'd undoubtedly be an awkward air where he and I were concerned, which includes when we're around Zayn and Liam, as I much as I didn't want it to be. It's inevitable. It wouldn't help that I'd have to see Niall with Jeremy, constantly, I don't think I'll be able to stomach it. The mere thought of it was enough to give me a headache. I pushed Jeremy out of frame, and that left only Niall on my mind again.

It was a lot more evident now.

I loved him. I love him.

More than in the way a Bestfriend should.

I missed the thoughtless touches that occurred whenever we were next to each other. When his soft hands would mindlessly grasp my hand and pick with my fingers.

I missed being next to him, just being around him consistently. When I got with Louis, I foolishly ignored how less and less that occurred. Foolishly, I allowed for it to happen.

I missed running my fingers through his unkempt but yet somehow perfectly kept sandy brown hair.

I missed him rummaging through drawers, and wearing my clothing, that always fit him perfectly, not in regards to actual size.

I missed the stolen kisses on his or my cheeks, that all seemed like nothing but jokes before now.

I' might never be able to experience these things again.

I grabbed onto the railing of the porch, I was reeling from how unreal all of this felt. Beads of sweat began to form on my forehead.

My breaths were becoming shorter. More erratic. It was like trying to breathe in a coat closet.

The spot on my chest where Niall had pushed me away was actually hurting.

My vision blurred as my eyes prickled with tears.

"Niall!" I shouted weakly. "Niall—"

As all of these awful feelings pressed on, I heard him.

"Harry I— Harry? Are you alright!?"

His hand touched mine where it sat on the rail and it sent a familiar warmth throughout my trembling body.

Tears were falling from my eyes uncontrollably.