Cynical Romantics (Completed)

Chapter Fourteen

For the first time in years, I wake up with a smile, not regretting it. Calum's still sleeping beside me with his arms around my waist. My smile grows as I lean into his chest and hug him back. Whenever I have physical contact with anyone, it feels weird, but this feels so right. I feel Calum move and place a kiss on top of my head.

"Morning" he says in his deep, raspy, morning voice.

"Morning" I reply, finally feeling nervous about encountering the boys again. I've never had a guy like me till Michael and I don't even know what I am to Calum, even though I told him almost everything last night. "We should go down before the boys wake up" I remind him, making him sigh cause I'm right. But if it were up to me, I'd lay there all day. Once we arrive in the living room, the boys are still fast asleep on the couches.

"Here, let's just make breakfast and wait for them to wake up" he says, entangling his fingers in mine once again.

"So, what's on the menu chef" I say.

"Pancakes!" he says with excitment in response.

"I always eat junk food when I come here! How do you manage to stay so in shape?" I ask, frustrated that I have to run a mile everytime I eat something like a donut or crisps.

"I'm on the team and we work out a lot there, plus I go to the gym regulary" he explains.

"Oh, I just ride my bike or run" I reply with a shrug as he starts putting together all the ingrediants in a bowl. "Hey Cal" I say before he has a chance to reply to my other statment.

"Yea?" he asks, looking up from the bowl he's mixing.

"You're not going to tell anyone what I told you last night right? I mean I was tired, and kind of sad, and I didn't kno-" he stops me from talking with another kiss.

"I'm glad you trusted me, and I'll never share what you told me without your permission" he says, relieving me from my worries.

"Well thanks for listening then" I tell him, unsure wether I told him that last night or not.

"I told you, I love learning new things about you" he repeats.

"Pancakes!" Ashton yells as he and Michael walk into the room, Michael barely managing to walk from how tired his is.

"You couldn't of let me sleep a little longer?" he asks as he makes his way over to me. Usually Calum doesn't care what Michael does with me, so I don't push him off when he hugs me and buries his head in my neck.

"Come on we have chocolate chip pancakes! It was worth getting up for" I tell him with a chuckle. I feel Michael's smile on my neck before he lifts his head up and gives me a peck on the lips.

"What made you two get up so early?" he asks. I shrug, I was just really excited to see Calum again I guess. I still get that sickening feeling around Cal, but I think I'm starting to like it. "Hey I want to take you out in the evening. Do you want to go to dinner? I know this great place by the bowling alley" he asks, basically ignoring the other boys in the room.

"Sure sounds like fun" I tell him, sneaking a glance at Calum and seeing him flip the pancake on the pan with no expression whatsoever.

***

I leave Calum's place after breakfast and head to my own to shower and have some alone time. I'm still getting used to all the socializing I'm doing here, even if it is mostly with boys. I mean I've hung out with Lola a couple times since I've arrived, but I feel as if I'm closer and can connect more with the guys or something.

I take out my textbooks and start doing the homework I need to do since I'm going to hang with Michael later. Michael's a lot like me I guess. Along with having the same music taste and punkish look, the other boys told me how Michael spent most his time locked up in his room before he joined the band. I find that really hard to believe considering how he seems so open around the boys and me, even after only knowing me for a few weeks.

After two hours of doing homework and studying, I'm finally done. I head downstairs to watch TV and see Karen there watching a recording of Modern Family, a show I like to watch as well.

"Hey Alex. Wanna watch with me?" she asks once she sees me. I nod and slowly make my way over to sit on the sofa next to her. "So how was your sleepover with Calum and the boys? His mom said all you guys did was eat and watch movies" she says once the add came on.

"Yeah that's basically it, but I woke up in the middle of the night and so did Calum so we talked for a while and stuff. It was fun" I tell her. I love how she's not like other guardians who make their kids avoid boy and girl relationships, even if it isn't in a romantic way. But I guess since she's watched Calum grow up and felt as if he was a second son, she's estatic that I'm getting along with him.

"You should invite him to sleep over here! Tell I need to see him more!" she excliams, causing me to laugh at her excitment.

"I'll make sure to when we walk to school together tomorrow" I tell her.

"You look cute, do you have a date?" she asks, probably noticing the purse I set on the ground.

"I'm not sure" I confess. Whenever I meet people I always feel a certain feeling around them; with Calum it's the feeling I hate yet love at the same time, with Michael it's a good, fun kind of feeling and I'm learning to be comfortable with it, but with Karen I automatically feel comfortable with her.

She pauses the show and looks straight at me, "Boy trouble?" she asks, getting even more excited once I nod. "Well go on!"

"Well Michael's made it clear that he's like me, but I'm just going along with it. But Calum's been really nice to me and I trusted him with something I haven't talked about ever since I got in the foster program. He makes me feel comfortable and I hate physical contact, but with Calum it feels so natural and I actually crave his arms around me! But I don't know what it feels like to actually like someone; I've been avoiding it for as long as I could remember, which wasn't so hard considering I never really talked to many people before I came here" I ramble to her.

"I'm gonna be totally biased here and say pick Calum, but I also have my reasons. When you like someone it should feel natural, just like how you feel with Calum. You have to trust him, which looks like you already do. How do you know he likes you?" she asks.

"He kissed me and we were cuddling as I told him about my past, but maybe he just wants to be friends" I say sarcastically, causeing her to laugh as well.

"That's sweet. But the real question is if you really want to be in a relationship" she clarifies.

"I'm not sure. I've always wanted to have someone like Calum, but I'm so scared I'm going to loose him once you ship me off to another foster house" I admit.

"You're not going to be shipped off to another foster house. I told you, every kid deserves a chance!" she reminds me, grabbing ahold of my hand for support.

"Thank you so much Karen. I've never really had people to turn to, but things are so much better here" I tell her before she engulfs me in a hug. I hug back and get reminded of my mother. No one can replace her, but she was the only one I could have discussions like this with. I'm actually relieved she's so much like my mother.

"So who are you going out with now?" she asks as she presses play on the program.

"Michael"

"Well see how it goes and see if he makes you feel comfortable. If not, tell him the truth. The truth will always set you free" she reminds me.

I nod and turn towards the TV as well, waiting for Michael to show up.