If Only (Something More Than Just This)

Chapter 1 (prologue)

Hello! So um... This is my first story O:) The story won't continue like this. This chapter is a bit too boring... But you have to read it to know what's going on. It's kind of like a prologue...? . Like just introduction! :) 

Any mistakes please point it out! And ideas? Sure go ahead and comment! :)

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Editing credits to @RachelD001

Thank you-all!!

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So here we go... I'm sixteen and I have nothing figured out. NOTHING. Ugh, my life is so messed up. They say that the storm passes by and it won't rain forever, but hey, guess what? It's been raining in my life for the past three years... And apparently the storm won't pass by. I don't hate my life, but I have too much to figure out. Too much to worry about.

I mean, I'm just sixteen! I'm supposed to be living like any other teenager. People think if you are rich.-TADA!- your life is perfect. But guess what? No, it's not perfect. Not until you lose family members for being rich. What most teenagers worry about is not buying the new Blackberry, having a bad hair day, or their crush ignoring them or something any ignorant, self-centered teenager would consider a problem.

I'm not saying I don't have those problems. I do, but I could care less because I have more important stuff to think and care about. The thing with me is that I care too much about other people, in my life or not. If I cared about you for just once, I would care for you forever. Weird, huh? But that's me.

Even if a stranger comes up to me and opens up about his or her problems, I can't just forget about them. Instead, I'll help them as much as I can, and trust me, it's not a good thing.

My life has changed. A lot. Nothing is real anymore, nothing feels right. I'm not me around people. I smile and act as if everything is fine even when it's not. Nothing is fine. Everything has changed.

I changed. I changed in so many ways, while deep inside I'm still the same old me. Moving schools wasn't the best idea, it just made my life more complicated. In every girls life there's a guy, no matter how much they deny it. There's always a guy.

I'm not going to deny it, before changing schools there was a very special guy in my life. My best friend.

His name? It's Blake Jacobs.

FOUR YEARS AGO

I had moved to my old school. At the beginning I didn't really know him, he was a year older than me and was known as the school's hottest guy. Back then I was twelve and he was thirteen. It was the second semester, as funny as it might be, we met at the nurse's clinic. I had a fever and he wanted an excuse to skip class, since then we started talking... At the beginning it was only a 'Hi' and 'Bye' thing, but then we started texting each other, walking to classes together, sitting together at lunch...

And somehow we became really close. I couldn't go a day without talking to him. All my girlfriends were all over him, every single girl in my school apart from me was in love with him. Trust me, it was annoying. Every time I reached the front gates of my school, I heard rumors about him which spread like wildfire.

Not that I had anything to do with it... His life has been always a mystery to me. He used to tell me everything, everything apart from his family and outside friends. During the summer we got closer, he used to come over and we used to watch movies and just hang out all the time. After the first month of summer he went on vacation to Australia. We skyped 24/7! When he came back, I kind of had this tiny crush on him. I used to get really jealous when he used to flirt with the other girls. He knew everything about me, I used to tell him everything, literally everything! Even the most embarrassing things about me! When we went back to school he was so popular that it pissed me off, all my friends used to tell me about how lucky I was to be his best friend and they used to talk about him ALL THE TIME!