The Rising Truth

Consultation

Thank you for reading! This is my shortest chapter yet.

Shoma pov. 

It was 6:00 am in the morning when I felt Sota shaking me.

"Ugh, Sota stop," I rolled over and buried my face in the pillow.

"Shoma, wake up!" He whispered aggressively.

"What? Is the house on fire?" I turn to glare at him

"No, but I think I realized something about Yuzuru." He looked at me with such intensity that I had a feeling he stayed up all night thinking about it.

"Are you serious? I'm going back to sleep." I pull the blanket over my head and try to go back to sleep when I hear Sota say,

"I think you're in love with Yuzuru Hanyu and that he's in love with you."

I immediately jerked my head towards him, "What?" I'm pretty sure I'm going deaf

"I said that I think you're in love with Yuzuru Hanyu and that he's in love with you."

"Why would you think that?" Shit. I need to play cool. Play cool. 

"Well, considering the only thing you talk about now is Yuzuru and how whenever he's mentioned, you have this lovestruck look in your eyes. Heck, you talk more about Yuzuru than I talk about Yuzuru."

"Well, I mean we are friends and all and his is my goal."

Sota just sighed and draped the blanket over his shoulder to protect him from the cold. "Shoma, we've been friends for a very long time so I'm going to be real with you for one moment. You're really oblivious."

"What?" I was really confused.

"When I greeted Yuzuru, he looked like he was trying not to show that he hated me. When you told him that you were sleeping here, he looked ready to murder me. He's jealous of the fact that we're friends. When Yuzuru was talking to you, he had that same lovestruck look that you have when you look at him. Don't you get it? You're both in love with each other."

I look at him like he's lost his mind. "I think you're insane."

He sighs again and looks me straight in the eye, "Are you in love with Yuzuru Hanyu?"

Play it cool. Play it cool. "What? No?" Good job, Shoma.

"I think you're lying." What? How could he possibly know? "Shoma, we've been friends for a while. I know when you're lying."

I roll my head into the pillow so that I could muffle my voice. "Ok, you're right. I'm in love with Yuzuru Hanyu."

"Ha! Knew it!"

I turn to look at him again, "Are you happy?"

"Why don't confess to him?" I'm convinced that Sota has lost his mind.

"What?! I can't just confess to Yuzuru Hanyu. He's Yuzuru Hanyu. Besides, we both know that if I confess, then one of his crazy fans are going to murder me in an alley."

"Yeah, that's true. Some of his fans are insane. But that doesn't mean you should give up. You love him, and I'm very sure that he loves you."

"Why would he love me? I'm short and ugly. I have low confidence and I don't do well in interviews and press conferences. I'm no where near to being his rival, heck, I apparently "cheat" jumps. There is no way he's going to love me."

"Ok, stop being such a negative Nancy." I give him the look again. "Apparently it's a slang used by American teens, but that's beside the point. Shoma you're beautiful and you need to stop listening to the haters. Also, if Yuzuru didn't like you, he wouldn't have like every single one of your Instagram posts and all of mine, that have you in it. Trust me, he's into you."

"But what if he doesn't return my feelings? What if we get together and he decided that I'm not worth it and pushes me aside? What if you break up with me because he wants to continue skating?"

Sota gives a steely gaze, "Shoma, if he doesn't return your feeling, then he's an idiot. If he hurts you in any way, I will hunt him down. So don't worry about that. However, you're going to be a lovesick idiot if this keeps going, and as much as I care for you, if you become like that then I will punch you."

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I was scrolling through blogs and social media looking for critiques of my skating. It is important for me to be aware of them since some usually point out mistakes that I've missed, but most are usually mean-spirited.

He's not good enough to represent Japan

He cheat on his jumps

 Pre-rotation

He's a terrible skater

These things get to you after a while, but I try to ignore them. Whenever I open up about how I;m feeling to Yuzuru, who always tells me that my skating is amazing and that I should ignore the haters.

He's so encouraging, that it reinforces the fact that I'm not the one for him. I'm not perfect in every way. I'm not effortlessly beautiful. I have to spend at leat 30 minutes of my hair so that it looks less like a bird's nest every morning, compared to Yuzuru who wakes up looking perfect. I have red patches on my cheeks that sometimes look like rashes, Yuzuru has skin that glows. I'm really short and Yuzuru is 5'7. I'm awkward in interviews while Yuzuru can just introduce himself and all of Japan will fall for him.

I can't be the perfect one for him. I just can't. I can't tear myself apart and stitch myself up again. I just can't.

It's a short chapter today since I have to go to work in an hour. Also, I'm going to mess with the timeline a little bit so Sota can have a bit more screen time. Thank you for reading. I'll put up a longer chapter tomorrow.