Collision | ✔️ | Blue Exorcist

Running On Empty

He wouldn't tell me how bad it was, and exactly what it was, but I had enough of a brain to figure it out; my leg was infected, pretty badly considering his reaction. I'd tried to talk to him about it, but he'd pushed away from me, going back to his usual spot and remaining silent for the rest of the night. He'd whispered off and on to Shura, and judging from her random looks of concern; she was pretty grim about my situation, as well.

I hadn't been able to sleep much that night, the idea that I might not wake up loomed over me, and although I'd recently found comfort in that, right now, it terrified me. So here I am, staring at the horizon, my eyelids heavy. Thankfully, my companions started to stir not much more than an hour later. I sat up and waited for them to come to, my thoughts wandering about. The first to wake up was Shima, and when he saw I was up as well, he became uneasy.

"Dude, what? If you've got a problem with me, just say so." I saw him freeze up, but then he relaxed, his eyes finally meeting mine.

"I don't have a problem with you Rin, it's just... everything." I blinked and gave him a puzzled look, he sighed and leaned his chin against his palm. "When all of this started, I was thrown from my seat and you guys took care of me." I could see the guilt in his eyes, and I was about to interrupt him, but he held his hand up. "Then, your brother got sick and our belongings got scattered. You went and took care of him and helped us out. And I find out that Koneko asked for you're help because he was more comfortable with you? Honestly, I never thought I'd hear of that, he was scared shitless of you for the longest time."

"Whats your point?"

"I'm not finished, then, to top it off, you've been sacrificing you're needs for us. You haven't eaten or drank anything in four fucking days before yesterday." His eyes flashed once more, this time in anger, "for the son of Satan, you're the kindest motherfucker I've ever met, and the stupidest."

I could help it, I laughed, the sound coming from my very core. It hurt my stomach and made me lightheaded, but in that moment, it was the best feeling I'd experienced in awhile. "I'll take that as a compliment."

"But honestly, why do you do that? You suffer in silence, and that makes it a bigger problem for all of us." He brushed the dirt off his shoulder and looked at me expectantly. In turn, I felt shame tinge my cheeks and I cleared my throat unnecessarily.

"I mean, I'm the son of Satan," I waited for him to understand, but he remained silent. "I'm kinda on a lower class than the rest of humanity."

"Oh for the love of Christ, don't." Shocked, I lifted my gaze to stare at him. He looked pissed, and I chewed on my lip. This is what happens when you open up books that should stay closed. "If you're think that you don't deserve to eat, or drink... that's fucked up man."

I sighed, "it's more than that, I just think you guys should get first dibs. I'm half demon, my body can take a harsher beating than yours."

He nodded, "I agree, you can definitely take a few more hits. But you're also half human, Rin. Once you've taken those extra hits, you'll tire out just like the rest of us, and it'll happen faster because you've taken those extra hits. You've obviously experienced that first hand yesterday..." he sighed, "by the way, how was almost dying? I don't mean that to be a dick."

I waved him off, "it's an interesting and... horrible experience."

He hummed, "noted."

.oOo.

The others got up not too long after Shima and I ended out discussion. They all woke up in the same, sleepy fashion, rubbing their faces and yawning. Once everyone was up and coherent I considered asking what would be done that day, but I squashed that idea when I reconsidered it. They'd all throw a fit if I mentioned moving around, I guess that happened when they find you half in the coffin.