What the hell was I thinking? I don't want to leave my brothers, my mom. I don't. I'm so stupid and selfish. I haven't talked to Jahseh since the incident and I gave Pump's gun back. I was scrubbing the blood off the floor again trying my best to clean this crap up.
I haven't talked to Timothy in a couple of weeks. You would think with summer starting I would talk to my best friend more than I have during the school year. I finally gave up and left the red stain there. It was the only one that wouldn't get out of the tile. There's just this red blob on the floor. Time to buy a new rug.
I heard a knock on my door and I ran down stairs. I opened the door hoping it wasn't Jahseh. It wasn't. It was an angel sent from above. Not Isaiah. Timothy. My best friend from California. I jumped in his arms and hugged him tight squealing in his ear.
"I'm sorry to interrupt your time with you and your boyfriend," he said.
"My who?", I asked as I pulled away to look at him.
"Isn't Isaiah your boyfriend?", he asked and I shook my head.
"He moved away. I lowkey forgot to fill you in on him," I said.
"You haven't been making a lot of music either. What happened?", he said stepping inside the house. We continued talk about how I got distracted and how he wanted to make another song with me.
"Did you start cutting again?", he asked me and I nodded. He shook his head.
"I'm glad you didn't do it," he said squeezing the shit out of me as he hugged me again.
"Let's just freestyle okay," I said trying to get out of his grip. Timothy agreed and let me go and we just looked for some beats to rap to. After a few hours, we saw that Ski made a new song with XXXTentacion called Take A Step Back. I know Ski held me back when I was getting my ass best my Ming, but I'm trying to forgive everyone and forget.
It was the second time listening to the song on my playlist and I pretty much had the lyrics down halfway. I had X's part I just had to listen for Ski's. Timothy said he had it down though.
"George W Bush right on her pussy yeah. Yeah, Curious George nigga looking boy your so pussy yeah. Yeah, hit my line for a nigga dick, check my Twitter yeah. Yeah, they call me young dagger dick that's my handle yeah. Yeah, she grab on my dick like a handle. Lil bitch I got on Jesus sandals," I sang along as me and Timothy got turnt.
We listened to a few more songs by X or Ski until one of Isaiah's songs came on. I paused as I listened to him rap over the speakers. It wasn't really his song, but he was in it. We were listening to Manikin and I realized his voice right when he came on.
"What's wrong Synthia?", Timothy asked me and I just ignored him as I turned off the computer.
"I just miss him. You wanna go make something?", I asked and he shrugged. We went down to the kitchen ready to make some pancakes. They were red velvet with cream cheese in the middle. Thank goodness for Grandma Reese and her creative spirit
After that we went to the beach and swam for a couple of hours playing baby crabs and all that. I even got to see a sea turtle up close. We were laid across the said gazing up at the night sky. I thought about Isaiah as I looked at the stars. I remember him telling me that he always knew what Orion's Belt was. The smiled to myself remembering his soft curly hair and how tall he ways.
"Synthia," Timothy said and I looked at him, "You wanna go?"
"Yeah. Sure," I said getting up and he got up too. We walked to his rental like a bunch of drunks. My feet hurt and I was tired as hell. Timothy suggested movie night and I decided I would fall asleep then I guess.
We sat in the car for a while and Timothy looked over at me and whispered something. I looked at him and raised an eyebrow.
"What?", he leaned closer to my ear and whispered to words that could change someone's life. SIKE. He said something to the extent of 'I think a crab pinched my nuts'. I couldn't help but laugh either.
"Can you kiss them and make them better for me?", he asked now sitting up straight in the drivers seat. I frowned and put a hand to my chest.
"Sorry nigga ion do that shit," I said and he laughed.
"I remember he day we met hella good," Timothy said and so did I, "I was standing behind you during lunch and you just walked up to me and said, 'What's going on lil chocolate nigga,' and I swear you scared the shit out of me cuz I thought you were some pervert teacher or something," Timothy said and I started laughing.
"Yeah. Oh! I forgot to tell you about that one moment when I actually had a girl friend," I said turning towards him in my seat.
"What's her name?"
"Jasmine. She transferred though because her grades were low," I said and he nodded, "I just tutored her though."
"Tryna replace me huh?", Timothy asked. I laughed at that absurd assumption. Who would wanna replace lil chocolate boy?
"Why the fuck are we still in this damn parking lot lil chocolate nigga?", I asked putting a lot of emphasis on fuck like you see those dude in the memes do.
"Ok ok damn. I didn't wanna look at you and drive, shit," Timothy said pulling out of the parking lot.
YOU ARE READING
T A K E A S T E P B A C K
FanfictionSynthia meets Jahseh after she moves to South Florida in high school. She produces and makes music and he's a fan of hers and he's trying to become her friend, but she's been hurt in the past and she barely wants something to do with people period...
