Juliana

39. Friends again?

*3 days later*

This was good. Juliana and I were finally talking to each other like decent human beings again. However, we were still far from getting back together. She had invited me over to her house to study some of this math. Honestly, I was glad to have my math tutor back.

"Robbie! Son, it's good to see you again." Aunt Grace gave me a warm welcoming hug as soon as I walked in the door. "When Jules told me about all that had happened with Matt and Gabby and Kylie.... I could have sworn I was watching a TV show!"

I chuckled, "Yeah. Pretty crazy."

Juliana rounded the corner. She wasn't dressed up at all, still in her glasses and her hair in a messy bun on top of her head. "Hey," She piped up. "Have your stuff ready for tutoring?"

I locked eyes with her for a minute before speaking up again, "Uh.. yeah... yeah, sure."

"Remember, Robbie. I'm just your tutor... not anything more, not anything less." She said sitting down at the table in the chair next to me.

"Yeah. Of course... just... yeah." I scratched the back of my head.

"Okay, so, what's your problem?"

"Uh." I caught myself looking at her again. I snapped out of it and looked back down at my textbook before she could catch me. "I'm struggling with this trig crap. I don't understand it. It looks like a big scrambled mix of the letters."

"They all have meaning, Robbie." She bit her bottom lip, shaking her head. "Like this one," She pointed to something that said "cos" in the book. "is adjacent over hypotenuse."

"I know that."

"I would hope so. It's basic basic trig."

"But then see, they throw all this other stuff in."

"Like this?" She pointed to this list with a bunch of complicated math on it. It was labeled Trigonometric Identities.

"Yes. What the hell is that?"

"Basically, it's a way to take things and either expand them or simplify them. Like see, cos a cos b is the same thing as (1/2)(cos(a-b) + cos(a+b). That's what we call a product to sum identity. Anytime you see either of those, you can substitute the other in its place!"

"Okay..."

A billion math problems and a gazillion hours later, I clapped my book shut and groaned. "Jules. This is dumb."

She looked up from whatever she was looking at, "It's Juliana, and I don't really care. You have to do the work."

"No... it's not the work I'm talking about. I finished it."

"Then what is it?"

I gestured for her to follow me outside, and we took a seat on the white bench swing on her front porch. Before we left, she let Aunt Grace know where we were.

"What is it, Robbie?"

"This isn't us. It doesn't feel right." I looked her right in the eye. "You and I both know it. I just... I miss you a lot, okay? And I swear, if you give me one more chance, it will be the last chance you'll ever have to give me because I'm not gonna mess up and lose you ever again. I promise. I promise you that."

I saw her cheeks were blushing, and she tucked a piece of her blonde hair behind her ear. "You..." She took a deep breath, "really need to stop making promises that you don't intend on keeping." She got up off the swing and stood in front of me.

"I swear, Juliana. I'm crazy as hell about you; only God loves you more than I do."

"Robbie." She sighed. "Please don't do this. I've listened to far too much Kasey Montgomery to just run back into your arms without any hesitation."

"You don't trust me?"

"No... I mean, yeah... well, no. I just..." She let out a huff. "I really don't want to end up hurt again. I fell for you, Robbie; I fell hard. And it's just like... whenever you get upset, I don't even know who you are. How do you think it felt to be called a bitch by somebody you loved and thought loved you? And then, when you tried to apologize, they told you weren't sorry. Need I even go into the whole Gabby thing?" She shook her head and crossed her arms. I saw a tear or two trickling down her cheek.

"I'm sorry, Juliana."

"You can be sorry all you want, but only time can take away the hurt." She was now what I would call sobbing and pacing back and forth on the porch looking up.

"Juliana, please. I swear over my mom's body and well being that I will try my damnedest to not hurt you again."

"Don't swear over things like that." She looked right at me. Her eyes were puffy red. "I just need some time, Robbie. Okay?"

"Okay..." I got up off the porch swing. "Could we at least be friends again?" I walked over to where she was standing.

"Can you handle being just my friend after everything we've been through?" She looked up at me.

"Yeah. Yeah, I can. Being just friends with you is better than nothing at all."

She smiled a little bit. "Then, sure. We can be friends."

"Awesome, so do just friends eat dinner at each other's houses? Cause if so, you wanna eat with us? I think Mom's making turkey for dinner."

***

"Oh, Juliana!" Mom wrapped her arms around Jules as soon as we walked in the door. "I sure have missed your face around here. You hungry? I'm making what I call a small Thanksgiving for dinner tonight, so there is more than enough for you."

Jules was beaming. "That sounds wonderful, Momma P. Thank you."

"Of course, sweetheart. Robbie, I need you to set the table please. Samuel already did the plates, and Tyla did the silverware. You and Danny have got drinks."

"Yes ma'am." I decided that it'd be easier to just do it myself than beg and plead Danny to help me out.

I got everyone a drink, and then, it was finally dinnertime. My whole family too their seat, and Juliana sat by me. Everybody was thrilled to see her again.

***

After we finished eating, Mom assigned Tyla and I dinner clean up. Jules came in and sat on a barstool while we cleaned up dinner. She offered to help, but Mom insisted that she didn't.

"So, Juliana, since you're like a big sister now, I wanted to tell you that I'm going to the Eighth Grade Spring Formal!"

"Oh, really? That's awesome!"

"Yeah." Tyla said scraping the leftover food on a plate into the trash. They were now talking back and forth so fast that I had no other option but to just sit back and listen.

"I'm so happy for you. So are you and him dating now, or are you just going as friends?"

"We're just friends for right now, but we've been talking a lot. I think he may ask me out soon. I don't know though; Daddy can be pretty intimidating."

"He just wants to make sure his baby girl is going to be okay. If he does ask you out though, can I help you get ready?"

"I was just about to ask you if you would."

"I'd love to, Ty."

Yeah. This whole just friends with Jules thing was gonna work. I just had to be patient and wait for her to realize that I wasn't going to go anywhere. It was just a matter of time now.