The Assassin (Shingeki no Kyojin/ Attack on Titan)

Decisions

Super sorry, for such a long wait. I know you don't care, but I just got into art school and now I feel wonderful enough to start writing again. Have you all seen the new English dub teasers for snk? I'm excited!

_________________________________________

"Hi, Geor--"

Without even thinking, I engulfed him in a warm embrace and mumbled, "Wow, what is wrong with me?" Armin didn't seem to hear me, though. 

He held onto me for a long moment, and by then it didn't seem like a reunion hug but more of a goodbye hug. I could deduce why he was here, however I didn't want him to leave. It was the first time I was actually resistant towards change. Armin finally pulled away to speak.

"It's good to see you, too, " he said with a small laugh. I could tell he thought I was acting really strange, which was true, but he was making an honest effort to make it seem normal, "I bet you can figure out why I'm here."

"...You're leaving."

"Mm-hmm."

"Tomorrow?"

"Today."

"Oh," I was mildly surprised. If I didn't know better, I would've carried on assuming he would be quite ceremonious with his goodbye. But the Scouting Legion gets to each of us in different ways. For him, saying goodbye would just be accepting moving on. Before I joined, something like that wouldn't bother me at all, but now I'm the one being left behind. Also, this was ceremonious. No one else would think to say goodbye.

"All of the preparations were completed early this morning," Armin explained, "We leave for Zhiganshina in an hour. Commander Erwin thinks I'm doing final preparations. But I actually came here to give you something."

Armin preceeding lightly pat my head.

"Um. Why did you do that?"

"It's from Jean."

"...Yeah, that doesn't explain anything."

"He's not very good at expressing his emotions."

"Since when?" I almost laughed.

"Since you left."

Suddenly that feeling of crashing through a window was coming back to me, but this time in full consciousness. Glass cut at my skin, wind knotting my hair, gravity doubling my body. The ferocity of that moment began to resurge. Didn't I tell him not to do that to himself? And great, now it's my fault. Everything is my fault. There's no going back.

"Well, I... I'm sorry," I tried, but it just wasn't cutting it. "Wish him my best, will you?"

"Why don't you?" Armin said with a flicker of hope in otherwise dulled morning eyes. I began to protest but he went on, "Georgie, he needs you right now."

"He doesn't need me. I ruined everything between us, remember?" I stared at my feet, "If he needed me, he would've come, like you just now."

"Exactly," Armin persisted, "Georgie, you can fix things."

"What are you talking about? There are too many things to be fixed. I can't fix them. I already had my last chance, and I blew it," I said sadly and taking a seat on the ground. Armin followed.'

"Erwin doesn't decide your chances," Armin pointed out, "You do. All you have to do is go talk to Jean. That's it."

"If... If you can convince me... I'll consider it. But there's no way that what I did is forgivable."

Armin thought for a moment and took up my offer. "When you left, Jean was a mess. I'd never seen someone so broken before, Georgie, you have to believe me. It's like you two traded places. He's all quiet and emotionless and you're all... Anyway, Erwin's got a lot riding on Jean for this mission and if he doesn't get it together, you know what'll happen."

"I don't see why it is that I'm the one who has to help him get it together. I'm the one who tore him apart, he'd never trust me."

"That's it," Armin said, "You changed him. He let you change him, and you know how stubborn he is. So you can bring him back."

I sighed frustratedly, "You don't get it! I can't just bring people back!" I gestured at the cemetary that surrounded us. "If I had only realized that earlier, I would've never joined the Scouting Legion."

"So that's what this is about? Quentin, right?"

He hit the nail right on the head. I suppose... in some way, I thought if I did what Quentin would do, it would somehow bring an essance of him back into my life. But I was wrong. It was such a foolish mistake, and now both Jean and I are suffering for it.

Armin put his hands on my shoulders and had me look straight at him, "Georgie. This is actually your last chance. If you don't do something, he's just going to become another Quentin to you. Just like you're becoming another Marco to him."

"Marco..." I whispered. I never found out who he was. In fact, it was the day I got booted that I first discovered a hint of him in Jean's collection of letters. "Does Jean still write?"

"Not so much anymore," Armin answered sadly.

If what Armin was saying was true, and Marco was to Jean as Quentin was to me... I couldn't let Jean go through that again. And it wasn't until that moment when Armin made me realize that I was putting myself through that all over again. Jean could go on not caring about me, but there was no way I could stop caring about him. I was in far too deep, now. And if I wanted to know Marco... 

"So, I can fix things?" I looked at Armin for assurance.

"Even a single word to Jean would make a major improvement."

"Well, then we haven't got much time."

Armin smiled determinedly and the two of us rode back into Trost, where the Legion would be leaving from. All of the soldiers were lined up on their horses and I scanned the crowd while Armin rode. We had fifteen minutes to find that familiar light hair.

"Over here," Armin reigned the horse around and I saw Jean, loading up the last of their supplies. I had a sudden horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach when he's attention fell on me. It was the first time we had seen each other in such a long time. His eyes were a sullen gray and his posture was slightly slumped. At a first glance, he seemed fine but I could see what Armin was talking about, him being a mess and all. But that didn't change the fact that I was really... nervous. 

"G... Georgie," Jean's lips took the shape of my name.

I hopped off the back of Armin's horse. Twelve minutes to fix Jean. Twelve minutes to make sure he doesn't leave this wall broken. I gulped in apprehensiveness.

"Didn't I tell you not to close off your feelings, you complete idiot?"

"Georgie!" Armin protested.

However, unexpectedly Jean smirked, "Didn't you ask me to wait for you catch up on your feelings?"

"Looks like I didn't need you after all," I shrugged.

"Rest assured, Georgeanna, I don't need you either."

"This is not going how I imagined," Armin groaned.

"Is that so?" I challenged, "Then why did Armin come to me, asking me to pick up all your broken pieces? Been moping around, lately, Jean?"

"Oh, please, if there's anyone moping around here, it's definitely you!" Jean retorted.

"Yeah, well--"

"JUST KISS ALREADY!" Eren yelled from five yards away, "Seriously, it would be a huge confidence boost to everyone. Right, gang?"

"What the blazes is going on here!?" A fuming Commander Erwin entered the scene, his eyes fell angrily on me.

_________________________________________

I'm cutting it a bit short for now, the next one will be... well, I don't wanna say just yet. I didn't proofread or edit, sorry! Thank you for reading, bye!

-Jo