Save Me

Chapter 11

I really was in no mood lately. Everything with Derek was driving me nuts. I wanted him, he wanted me, yet he didn't. He just kept saying we can't be together. I think I got it now thanks. I felt like we were drifting apart. Our feelings for each other had really put a strain on the friendship we had. I hung out more with Ginger and Anna. Sera had found her mate apparently and left the pack. I couldn't help but feel happy. She was nice and all but she was to close to Derek. Anna and Ginger took sympathy with me on the emotional struggle I was going through. Anna felt the same way about some guy at school and Ginger liked Danny, but they weren't mates. So they understood. Of corse none of their feelings were as strong as mine towards Derek. I told them I loved him. The couldn't help me any. But they sure tried to keep me busy. It worked for the most part. But I really felt like Derek and I weren't as close. Maybe it's better this way I thought. But my heart still screamed out in pain at me. I was really at war within myself. I was tearing myself apart. I was being stupid and I knew it. But I couldn't help but think everyday what it would be like to be Derek's mate. To love him forever. I thought for a moment he was going to kiss me a week ago when we were in the elevator but he didn't, like always he said we were incompatible. How many times does he think I need to hear this? I got the picture. Just because I understood, didn't mean I could stop feeling the way I felt about him. I couldn't tell if it was that easy for him or not. The pack didn't like the strain. They could feel the tension in the air and it made the rest of them uncomfortable. Derek hung with the guys a lot now. I guess kinda like he did before I came. And that's how it seemed. Like I wasn't there. It really hurt me at times.

I laid on my bed in my room and stared at the ceiling. I held fire in my hands. I learned how to control the earth element completely and I was starting to learn how to control the fire. I had a green streak in my hair next to the blue, and I had orange, red marks from my back up over my shoulders. I sighed. I was pretty much on my own with this anymore. I wanted to cry, but I was stronger than that. I needed to get used to being on my own again. As much as I craved Derek's attention and company, I also wanted nothing to do with him. Every time we were close, he would hurt my feelings and break my heart. It was better this way, I knew that. But yet I felt like I was hurting even more than before. Why was life so complicated? I went to the In-between a lot, which was the name I gave the place where my mother was. I asked her these things often. Her answer was always the same, "Because darling, life just isn't fair." I knew that. It didn't help me feel any better though. It made me feel almost even worse. I often thought lately, why me? Mother said I should really be asking, "Why not me?" She was very philosophical at times, and very lost in others. She sometimes seemed so far gone from the reality that was the In-between. I always got her attention back though.

There was a small knock at the door and I yelled come in, disintegrating the fire in my hands. Danny entered smiling.

"May I?" He said motioning to the bed.

"Yea, sure, sit. What's up?" I asked, wondering why he was here.

"Can I talk to you, about Derek?" Oh god. I really didn't want to talk about him.

"Danny I really don't know -

He cut me off, "Elsa please? I really need to talk to you. Look I know you guys are having a lot of... issues, but you guys were best friends. What happened Elsa?"

I sighed, "Danny, I don't want to talk about him."

"Can you at least answer my question?"

"Derek is.... I mean, we were yes. Best friends. But I started to feel for him and him for me. But the whole mate thing just got in the way. Every time we got closer, he would push me away and tell me how we could never be together. After a two months of that, how could you be best friends? He is never around anymore. And if he is, well I'm here. If I went missing I don't even think he'd notice. It hurts to much to see him, because I love him Danny. I really love him." I said, trying not to cry.

Danny grabbed my hand. "It'll be ok angel. I promise. I'm sorry things can't work out. Which is why it makes this all to easy for me."

I looked at him questionably, and his hand flew over my mouth with a cloth. I screamed and kicked at him, but I got dizzy, and I couldn't stay awake. Darkness consumed me.

Derek's POV

I walked down the sidewalk, coming home from the park. I wasn't home much anymore. It hurt to much to be around Elsa. I knew that I was hurting her, but being away from her was better for her in the end. I knew one day I'd have a mate and with the feelings she has for me, it would kill her. She didn't seem to like me as much now, and honestly it hurt like hell but I knew me pushing her away was better for us both. I loved her a lot yes, but I couldn't betray my wolf ways and rules. I looked up everything I could on mates and mating for werewolf's. I found nothing but what I already knew. That wolfs have mates, and they were other wolfs. And that their bond was inseparable. I frowned. Life wasn't fair, and love hurts. I didn't think I'd ever fall for Elsa. But somehow I did. I mean it's normal to have crushes. Even wolfs. But to get Into a relationship with a person was unheard of for a wolf. Sometimes I truly hated myself. At times I wanted nothing more then to be human. Or anything but a wolf, just so I could be with her. But it doesn't work that way. Life doesn't play the way you want it too. I felt awful for the pain I was putting Elsa in, but I was in just as much pain, if not more. More for the simple fact that I could hear her cry in the middle of the night, I could see the pain in her eyes, and more because I knew it was me that was making her that way. I felt like a giant piece of shit most days. But I had to protect her. Even if that meant breaking her heart. She would heal from that, I was sure.

I walked over the bridge of the river that went through the town. What was I doing? I sighed. I wanted Elsa back, but no matter what I knew I couldn't do that. I looked into the river and something caught my eye. I jumped over the bridge and landed on the ground. Water up to my mid caff, rushed past me. I picked up the thing that caught my eye. It was the necklace I gave Elsa to hide her wings. Something was wrong. Elsa was in trouble.

I ran as fast as I could back to the house. I broke the door down and ran up to her room.

"Elsa!" I screamed loudly. "Elsa where are you!"

I got no answer. She wasn't here. There was a familiar sent in the air, but I couldn't concentrate on it. I pulled out my cellphone and called Elsa's number. No answer. I tried five more times. Still no answer. I called Danny. He didn't answer either, which was typical of him. I called the rest of the pack, "Elsa's gone missing. She was taken. We need to find her now. She could be in danger." I said. Please god please. Let Elsa be ok. I couldn't bare to lose her.