My Brave Rebel: Book One (Bellarke)

Part 19

CLARKE:

We had been walking and looking for a few days now, and still nothing! There was no sign of him anywhere. But I would never be able​ to live with myself​if I gave up. Some of the others (mostly Finn( were starting to get tired and didn't see the point anymore. Luckily I had Octavia who were just as set as me to find her brother. Besides, Jasper followed her anywhere and would go through hell for her so he was still on board.

We had stopped by a large tree to have some water.

"Clarke, I hate to be the one who says this, but it's no use." Finn explained.

"Leave if you want to." I said back at him, not really giving a shit.

He shrugged his head.

"I know you love him, Clarke, but you are holding on to something that's no longer there. I'm sure he'd forgive you if you gave up."

I couldn't help staring at him. The asshole in front of me. I can't believe I ever shred for that guy. That pussy. Then I hear a fist being swung and Finn stumbled backwards, covering his nose.

"What the fuck?!" He yelled hysterical.

"That's for not believing my brother is alive, you piece of shit" Octavia spit at him, being held back by Jasper. She shaked her hand in frustration, and pain from the punch. Then she turned to me.

"So, where to Clarke?" She asked optimistic.

It was these times I hated being the leader. I had no idea where to go. No idea where to look or even how to look for him.

"We continue down the hill to the end of the path and go from there." I said, just following my gut.

I grabbed my gun and walked over to Finn, what was still covering his bloody nose.

"We leave now. With or without you."

"I pray for you, Clarke. May God be with you on your death mission! I'm out."

I didn't expect Finn to​ continue but I did expect him to, at the same time. I can't explain it.. I guess I just felt like he owed me that. After everything. But he would just slow us down anyway with his negativity and doubt. We were better off.

"Alright then!" I said, not affected or bothered by his descision.  I turned around and lead the rest of the group, Octavia by my left side, Jasper by hers and Wilim on my right side.

BELLAMY:

I woke up in a dark place, not able to make out where I was or how I got there. There was nothing surrounding me. Just me in a darkness of nothing.

"Hello?" I tried, but the only answer I got was my echo. I sat up, my head pounding in pain. I lifted my hand to the back of head and felt blood and a cut where it came from. I got on my feet slowly, only moving as fast as my body would allow. How the hell did I get here? More importantly, how the hell would I get out? I tried walking one way, but I never ended up somewhere. There were just darkness and nothing else. Then I spotted a dot of sunlight on the floor. I followed it with my look to a small peephole. I didn't see much, just sunlight. I'm under ground. I started to panic and feel suffocated. The air was thick and it smelled like mold and dirt. My stomach made a scream for food an my throat could definitely need some water. Who put me in her? What did they want? Starve me to death? See how long I could survive before I lost my mind?

"Hello? Anybody? Where the hell am I?" My voice sounded raspy and​ every word grinded on the way out. I waited for an answer or even just a second that confirmed I wasn't alone. But I was. I laid down, my face covered by the light spot as I wondered if my death would be painful or peaceful. I hoped neither. I hoped it would be like falling asleep. Like falling asleep with Clarke in my arms. The last thing I would remember would be how happy I was. And ten death could silently creep up on me without me noticing. I felt weak for feeling this way, but the truth was, I was really tied of always fighting, always being strong, always being there for everyone. I was exhausted and I needed a break, just ​for a little while. I closed my eyes and listened as the silence filled my head and there was no longer a single thought left in my mind, except the only one who was keeping me alive; Clarke. I stayed alive for her, because I promised her that I would come back.

CLARKE:

Another day had gone by and there was nothing new at all. I was tired. We all were. And it felt like I was killing my group but they kept following me out of compassion.

"Do you think we're doing the right thing here?" Octavia asked me doubtfully. "I mean! Don't get me wrong! I would go through hell for Bell, but..."

"I understand why you're doubting, O, but, I just can't shake this feeling that he's right here! I just can't see him"

"I know this sounds crazy, but maybe you can like...feel him looking over you, from ​up there" she said quietly so the others couldn't hear. Looking up at the sky.

I thought about it for a moment, and looked up as well.

"He's not there" I sadly smiled at her as I looked down again.

We continued walking. We were at a green meadow with tall grass and flowers. The Moss under my feet sunk down for each step I took until one step when it didn't sink, but just disappeared. The ground beneath my feet was none-existing and I feel down, before I landed on my back as I hit a concrete floor. And then there he was. The boy who promised to come back. His body laying lifeless and peaceful at the ground. Please God, say he was alive. Cause if he was dead, so was I.