Hours, days, then weeks passed. Silent weeks full of passing each other, occasionally catching eyes on the bus and plenty of tears shed. He got sick a few days after he had written the letter and had a hard time performing for about a week. He was better now, health wise, but he still wasn't talking to me. He was back into his performances and still lit up when he saw the fans, but behind the scenes, he didn't smile. I tried approaching him when we were in Salt Lake City, Utah.
"Hi Niall..."
"Hi." He was sitting in the changing room on a chair waiting for Louise to do his hair, so I was looking at him through the mirror.
"How have you been?"
"Fine, how have you been?"
"I've been alright. I'm glad you're not sick anymore."
"Yeah me too. Are you sleeping alright?"
"Yeah... I haven't woken up screaming in a while... It's just harder to fall asleep when..."
"Spencer, please don't. I'm sorry that it is taking so long. Just... give me until Los Angeles, okay?" He said, turning to face me. I nodded and backed up a little bit.
"Yeah, no yeah that's... yeah."
"I'm sorry... please don't hate me." I just nodded and walked away, finding myself backstage.
It was another week since then to when we arrived in Los Angeles. This was our last stop until we went to South America, but we were staying here for five nights. The first three nights, I waited. I didn't approach him at all, I just waited. I didn't want to rush him, and was beginning to think that maybe I shouldn't join the band for the rest of the tour. I told Gemma, and she said that she would join me back at home if I decided to leave. We had two nights left, and if he didn't say anything tonight, I planned on telling Liam that I was going to go home after the final concert in L.A.
Gemma and I decided to sit in the audience at this nights concert, it had been a while since we had actually seen them perform. Besides, Lou had some trainees from a school of beauty here who wanted to see what it was like working on the road, so they took our place tonight.
We went into the audience while the 5SOS boys were playing, which made Gemma incredibly happy to see Ashton perform. The girls around us were freaking out that they got to sit with us, and I swear we were in a million selfies. The lads came out after the 5SOS boys and I could feel their energy, they looked alive. We were on the very front row, so they Liam and Harry kept making faces at us. I occasionally caught Niall looking over at me.
Their performance was almost over now, and it had been full of excitement.
"Alright Los Angeles, we have two songs left for you tonight!" Zayn said, making the audience scream, not that they weren't already, but they screamed louder. They all sat down around the stage. Harry sat on the left steps, Louis on the right steps, along with Zayn, Liam sat on the glass bridge that had flown across the arena earlier... and Niall sat at the front of the stage with his legs hanging off the edge, guitar in hand, and began the song with the first few chords. I knew the song, and he sang every word, looking me directly in the eyes. As he was singing, his eyes began to fill with tears.
Said I’d never leave her cause our hands fit like my t-shirt,
Tongue tied over three words, cursed.
Running over thoughts that make my feet hurt,
Bodies intertwined with her lips
Now she’s feeling so low since she went solo
Hole in the middle of my heart like a polo
And it’s no joke to me
So we can we do it all over again
If you’re pretending from the start like this,
With a tight grip, then my kiss
Can mend your broken heart
I might miss everything you said to me
And I can lend you broken parts
That might fit like this
And I will give you all my heart
So we can start it all over again
Can we take the same road two days in the same clothes
And I know just what she’ll say if I make all this pain go
Can we stop this for a minute
You know, I can tell that your heart isn’t in it or with it
Tell me with your mind, body and spirit
I can make your tears fall down like the showers that are British
Whether we’re together or apart
We can both remove the masks and admit we regret it from the start
If you’re pretending from the start like this,
With a tight grip, then my kiss
Can mend your broken heart
I might miss everything you said to me
And I can lend you broken parts
That might fit like this
And I will give you all my heart
So we can start it all over again
You’ll never know how to make it on your own
And you’ll never show weakness for letting go
I guess you’re still hurt if this is over
But do you really want to be alone?
If you’re pretending from the start like this,
With a tight grip, then my kiss
Can mend your broken heart
I might miss everything you said to me
And I can lend you broken parts
That might fit like this
And I will give you all my heart
So we can start it all over again
If you’re pretending from the start like this,
With a tight grip, then my kiss
Can mend your broken heart
I might miss everything you said to me
And I can lend you broken parts
That might fit like this
And I will give you all my heart
So we can start it all over again
