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I visit AJ even more now, each time expecting him to be getting miraculously better. But the opposite happens.

He's deteriorating, slowly but surely. The wheelchair disappears completely and he remains in his bed.

Jasmine, however, seems to be improving. She still calls about her static nightmares, but she's gained enough weight back to look healthy.

I let her know that I'm proud of her. She doesn't swear me out or anything. She just smiles tiredly. I'm happy for her and sad for AJ.

Happy and sad. My life flips between the two emotions constantly. But it seems to always go to the latter instead of the former.

God, I'm so fucking whiny. My problems feel ridiculous compared to AJ's and Jasmine's. As if they don't matter.

Huh. Maybe they don't.

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