Warning: Slightly offensive, stereotypes. If you're offended by this THEN GET IN THE DAMN SPIRIT YOU CAR FUCKER.
~
"ALRIGHT YOU FLAG FUCKS, GATHER ROUND!!!!" You shouted into a megaphone. The large crowd groaned and made a large clump in front of you.
"IT IS JULY FOURTH, THE DAY OF AMURICA AND INDEPENDENCE!!!! SO GO GET YA SHOTGUNS AND BUMPER-STICKER COVERED CARS, WE'RE GOIN HUNTING!!!" You shouted, your American flag pants flying in the breeze along with your tight leather vest that had stars on it.
"Oh man~ I'm hungry... can we go to Ichiraku's first?" Naruto asked, raising his hand. You zipped right in front of him.
"FOOLISH BOY!! ANY FOOD IS OFF THE LIST UNLESS IT'S HOTDAWG'S OR HAMBURGERS!!!!" You shouted right in his face, knocking him over.
"HOW DARE YOU, I'M A VEGAN, YOU'RE KILLING OUR ANIMALS!!!"
"THEN TURN INTO A FUCKING GIRAFFE SO YOU CAN EAT ALL THE PLANTS YOU WANT, OR GO BACK TO YOUR OWN COUNTRY!!!" You shoved the microphone into their face.
Edgy. And offensive.
"LET'S GO!!!" You exclaimed, cocking the shotgun and marching into the forest.
"🎶 AMERICA, FUCK YEAH! COMIN' AGAIN TO SAVE THE MOTHERFUCKIN' DAY, YEAH. AMERICA, FUCK YEAH! FREEDOM IS THE ONLY WAY, YEAH TERRORISTS, YOUR GAME IS THROUGH 'CAUSE NOW YOU HAVE TA ANSWER TO AMERICA, FUCK YEAH!🎶" You sang loudly into the woods.
"GRAB YER CIGARETTES AND BEER BOTTLES!!! WE'RE PINNING THE AMURICAN FLAG TO EVERY TREE IN THIS FOREST!!!" You shouted while dumping five truckloads of flags onto the ground. The crowd sweatdropped.
The only problem I have with America is that American, but Amerishouldn't.
Can this be our foreign policy from now on?
"FUCK CANADA, FUCK GINA— I MEAN CHINA, FUCK BRITAIN, FUCK NEW ZEALAND, WE'RE THE BEST, I REFUSE TO BELIEVE WE'RE NOT, LET'S GET IT OWN!!!!" You shouted, firing your machine gun. By now half of the crowd had left and went back to Konoha. You ran over towards the truck and pulled out two boxes and placed them on the ground. A flame appeared on your finger as you placed it in the box. You quickly scurried away as the boxes exploded and colorful light blasted into the sky.
"OH SAY CAN YOU SEEEEEEE!!! BY THE DAWN OF EARLY LIGHT!! WHAT'S SO PROUDLY WE HELD AT THE TWILIGHT'S LAST GLEAMING!!!"
The last of the group left you to screech and the red, white, and blue fireworks with your hand on your heart.
"She's really scary when holidays come around, huh?" Choji asked, munching on some chips.
"She's really mental..." Ino added.
No in all seriousness, happy Fourth of July/Independence Day, whatever you wish to call it. This was meant for shits and giggles, so don't get your dicks and panties in a twist. I hope you all have a good day and eat a lot of hamburgers or hotdogs, and if you're vegan, you can eat a plant.
But no, like 3/5 vegans I've ever met were such assholes.
YOU'RE CONSUMING THE ANIMALS FOOD, YOU MONSTER!!!
But anyways, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, once again, this was for laughs and giggles. I put a warning on top, so don't say I didn't warn you. Good morning/evening/night, and God bless you. Or whatever God you believe in. And for atheists, I have blessed your soul, be grateful.
Ja ne!
{Ruby Red}
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Scroll 3: Life or Death? |Naruto Shippuden| |Reader Insert|
FanfictionY/n Akuma, one of the strongest clan members of her time has to deal with a problem that's bigger than an empty plate. ... a war... Tobi, or 'Madara', a member of the Akatsuki has declared war against the Five Great Nations. Unfortunately, Y/n has t...
