Stockholm Syndrome

39: Dominance

39: Dominance

He kissed me again. I kissed him again? He kissed me. This time it was his fault. Actually, I was the one that tripped... I had come down from the tree and Luke had trailed behind me as I slowly made my way to the house. Reminded me of a vampire.

My foot was caught in a hole and, being me, I fell and somehow managed to sprain my ankle and bruise my knee.

Luke was calm as I sat there and whimpered in agitation.

 He knelt down and worked my body into a position where he could pick me up. His lips and nose pressed into my hair, messing it up. I felt his breath for a moment. Then he picked me up and it still amazed me that it took such a small amount of effort. He carried me into the house like an oversized baby, cradling me in his arms. It would be a comfortable position if it wasn't his arms. The man who abducted me at 10 P.M. on a Friday night. But then we made eye contact.

And I don't think – I hope – I encouraged him to do anything. But when we made it inside, and he set me on the kitchen counter, he didn't move to get first aid as I had hoped. No. He stood in between my legs – the position we were in when he set me down – and stared at me. I stared at him, breathing hard. Then our lips were attached. I had already been so out of breath that, by the end, I was lightheaded. He had looked at me and bit his lip. Then he slid his tongue over his bottom lip and took a deep, heavy breath.

"You need an icepack." He whispered. Then he had turned and left me on the counter.

Now, I was sitting on the kitchen counter crying as I waited for him.

If I hadn't finally given in to my friends telling me to socialize, I wouldn't have been out when he kidnapped me. I wouldn't have had to tell anyone about my anorexia. Nobody would have known. And I wouldn't have had to go through the sickening feeling of fear I had the first weeks I was here and still have now.

 And I wouldn't be dealing with Stockholm Syndrome, of all things. I shook my head, suddenly not wanting to see Luke's face again. I would cry even harder if I did.

I slid off the counter, wincing as I did so. I limped across the living room and was almost to the stairs when he came out of a hallway. I kept my head down, refusing to look at anything about him except for his shoes.

"Madeline." He warned, his voice soft but firm. I shook my head and started my attempt up the stairs. I staggered and was eventually hopping up on one foot. I cursed him for getting a house with a large amount of steps. I don't think he was too worried about me trying to run, I couldn't even if I wanted to. He followed behind me. But I could feel his breath going down my neck. His hands shot out when I staggered but I warned him off.

"Don't touch me." He silently relented, but he didn't back off and I shivered, afraid of what he could do to me with no issue. I finally made it up and for some reason stuck with the bedroom he always had me in. I squeezed in through the barely opened door, slammed it before Luke could follow, and locked the door.

 I knew he would probably have a way to fix that but the few moments before he did was what I wanted. I slid a huge dresser in front of the door, figuring that might buy a little more time to be by myself.

I sat cross legged on the floor in front of the door, head down. I think it took Luke about twenty minutes to get through the lock and the dresser.

When he semi frantically pushed his way in, my body heaved and I began sobbing. He scared me out of my wits. The most terrifying person I had ever met was standing above me right now. He had complete control of me and I had no way to get out of that. So I stared at his shoes again.

They were black boots. No laces.

 That was as far as I got before Luke wrapped an arm around my waist and had me stand up.

 He walked me to the bed and had me lay down. I was in hysterics again. I think we were both shocked because we thought we were past this part. But I was still terrified by Luke's complete dominance over me. He seemed to sense that. He tucked my hair behind my ears, helped me find a comfortable position on the pillows and sat on a chair by the wall instead of next to me. I ignored his stare and closed my eyes, willing darkness to come.

When I woke up, Luke was still there. He had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in his hand and a book in the other. He had reading glasses on. As I watched him, he bit into a half of his sandwich. I sat up and let my head hang back, exposing my neck, as he looked over to study me. I took a deep breath but it was cut short in terror when the bed dipped and Luke sat on my right side. He had ditched the sandwich and his books but his glasses were still perched on his nose. He groaned.

"What's wrong with you?" He asked. His tone wasn't accusing or angry, just tired.

"What is that supposed to mean?" I whined.

"I've been taking care of you as best I can. I haven't done enough to give you a reason to be so afraid of me." He complained, his voice steady. I sat up and glared at him.

"Are you kidding me? You've given me every reason in the world to be terrified of you. Don't try to play this off like I'm overreacting." I spoke firmly even though we both noticed my voice tremble.

"If we had met under any different circumstance, what would have you this afraid of me?" He countered. "I get that you would be a little intimidated, lots of people are, but not enough to go into hysterics."

"But we didn't meet under any other circumstance. We didn't even meet. I was kidnapped." I retorted, refusing to acknowledge that he was right. I had complete rights to be terrified. He stuck his hand out, grinning softly.

"I'm Luke."

"Are you seriously joking about this?" I asked angrily.

"Joking about what?" He said, pointedly losing his grin in mock confusion.

"If we start over, wouldn't that mean that I can leave without you stopping me?" I said quietly. I couldn't tell if Luke nodded but he gave me some sort of indescribable look that told me he couldn't believe it himself that he was approving of this.

"I'm Luke." He repeated.

"Madeline." I said, my voice small. I timidly stuck my hand out and his completely engulfed mine. His hand was warm. Soft but rough all at the same time. I took a deep breath. "Tell me about yourself." I said, trying to act like we met at a coffee shop although I was already sitting in his bed, dressed in one of his T – shirts. I wanted to see how much I could get from him.

"Just a college dropout." He shrugged. "Nineteen, mom's dead, never knew my father." He revealed. "You?" He raised his eyebrows. I bit back a comment about how he would already know.

"My mom's dead, too. Dad's a drunk." I answered. Luke waited pointedly and I rolled my eyes. "Seventeen, finished high school because I don't need the grades. Work at a Dutch Bros. But something tells me I'm fired." I bit my lip. Luke chuckled.

"How could that be?" He teased.

"I forgot to call in." I answered, risking a grin back at him. I stood up. "I know it's a weird thing to ask a stranger but where's my clothing?" I looked at him pointedly. He walked to the closet and pulled out my clothes, handing them to me. "I'm changing." I told him, closing the bathroom door. I knew this wouldn't last long. I knew this was just a plan to help me stay out of hysterics. But the stupid thing was that I was going along with it.