human ↦ calum hood {au}

thirty-one: files

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE:

| lynette’s pov |

The doctor in front of me looks at a few papers then looks up at me, an indecisive expression on her face.

What did those files say?

I was dying to know; it wasn’t helping that I was like an idiot, who knew nothing about my own self.

I felt a hand stay on mine, as some kind of comforting action, but finding out that Calum wasn’t just the pharmacist I’ve come to know– I only felt more uncomfortable.

The only thing he said when I asked him if he knew was, “I know more than enough about you to be this worried.”

It was a hundred-percent puzzling reply, but I had no one to turn to right now. He was the only one who was willing to help me; there was no other person who would.

Because I was a monster, and I probably still am, deep inside this whole amnesia incident.

“Have you felt anything… serious in these past few months?” She asked, setting down the folder on her table and putting her hands together.

Remembering some incidents from the past, I slowly nodded. “Well, um, lately, I’ve been restless. I don’t know, my feet get cold sometimes, my ankles are swelling and… some other stuff.”

“Stuff? What do you mean exactly?” 

Calum’s hold on my hand got a little bit tighter. He’s nervous.

“I… I’m very confused. There are people I hear and people I see, but it’s not real. They’re all just in my imagination.” I really did try to explain it in a way I wouldn’t sound like I was out of my mind, but it doesn’t work.

It just doesn’t.

She drank from the bottle of water on her side and flipped the folder open, revealing some test results. I don’t know if that had been from the bottle of pills she asked for earlier or if it was about my past, but I had a feeling I wouldn’t like what she had to tell me.

“You see, I’m afraid that you’re experiencing the major side effects of your medicine. I don’t know why this is what you’re drinking because it’s not in your medical history from your previous doctor.”

“Major side effects? Not in my what?” I repeated the information I managed to grasp from her, shocking me. 

“We’ll discuss that later on, Miss Moore. How many times do you drink your pills in a day?” 

“Twice… thrice? I don’t know, sometimes, four. I drink them whenever I feel like it,” I answered, getting more and more frightened of what was to come.

“Oh, no…” she mumbled, rubbing her temple. “Okay, don’t… don’t be surprised, Miss Moore, but you’re experiencing severe side effects of Propanolol. The colding of feet, the swollen ankles, and the hallucinations are all because of it.”

A humorless laugh comes out of my mouth; I am sickly. All this time, worrying about not drinking these pills when I should’ve stopped long ago.

Stupid– I’m so stupid.

Calum’s gone now; he stood up and walked out of the room. I wanted to do the same, but it’s something I can’t do when I want to know the truth.

“May I please see those files?”