My Heart's Desire [A My Candy Love fanfic]

Chapter 17: It's Bad For My Heart

"Doctor is she going to be okay?!"

"She's badly hurt! You guys need to do something!"

"It wasn't her fault!"

Those where the words I could faintly hear as I was looking at the passing lights. I couldn't hear whose voices they were but I didn't want them to see me in this state.

'Why did this have to happen again? Why can't I be normal?'

Tears began to form again and I felt so weak and helpless, I felt as if I were sinking to darkness every time I thought about the incident. At this point did I even wish to keep on living? I don't have the will anymore, in the end I'm just left alone. Mother have you come to punish me?

I felt it harder to breathe and then it just stopped. The pumping of my heart, the blood the flowed through my veins, and the warmth of my body told me I was still living. But how long could I keep it up? Slowly but surely I could feel it decreasing, each beat slowly loosing rhythm. I was just tired, I was never told it would be this hard to live. But was I really prepared to abandon everything? That's what kept lingering in the back of my head.
•••••••••
"Myra please don't leave me! Sweetie you have to wake up, I promised her that I would keep you safe. So please open your eyes."

That was the voice of my aunt that I recognized. Why is she here? She was going to be out of town for some time. Who told her? Am I dragging her down too?

"Myra!"

With eyes barely open, I turned my head to see my crying aunt that looked as if she had lost something precious. I tried to muster out words but no sound came out.

"Don't strain yourself to talk, just take it easy. I'm just so glad you finally woke up." My aunt said as she smiled as more tears began flowing from her face.

"F-Forgive m-me." I said ever so faintly as did my best to talk.

"Don't. You haven't done anything wrong, I should me the one asking for forgiveness. I'm sorry for not being there when you needed me the most. I have failed you and my sister." She said with such pained face.

I raised my hand and cupped her cheek. "I've never blamed you because have already done so much for me. You haven't failed anyone." I said softly as I gave a weak smile.

"Myra... I thought I was going to lose you. When I came the doctor had told me that your heart stopped pulsing and it took a while to for you heart to start beating." She spoke with heavy words as she took my hands into hers.

I was being selfish the whole time, I didn't deserve her kindness nor anyone else. I kept pushing them away from me when I needed them, to the point where I almost drove my self to death. The one who would be apologizing is me, all I've done is worry them and made them cry. I told myself I wouldn't be a burden but instead the opposite happened and now I'm here. So why am I so ungrateful? I just let the negativity consume me before thinking twice, it was stupid of me to think I was alone. The past is the past and I have to move on, this is what I have to do now or else I'll never stop being a burden.

"I'm fine now, I won't make you worry ever again. I didn't want to repeat the same scenario but I did, I was just to scared of losing everything again. It just got to the point where it became bad for my heart and... I'm just glad that I have you and my friends to help me get back up on my own two feet. Just now, I need to settle some things and get them off my chest." I said determined.

"I'm glad to hear that." She said as she kissed my forehead.

"By the way... um did anyone else come? Before I went unconscious I heard some people but I didn't know who."