CHAOTIC.

Maybe we've changed

Prose ~~~

Time passed, best friend
And so did our days
That didn't really intertwine, not even once

I witnessed you when you were still fond of singing lyrics that mean nothing to you,
I witnessed your first haircut, your second one, your grandma and step father's death and how you lost a bit a weight,
how your walls grew taller along with your height

I saw how you moved on from agony and wrote down in your little leather hugged journal,
back when my journal was cleaner and when it was blue and fluorescent

I witnessed your smile getting bigger along with your confidence.

But i grew with you too, best friend

I was a kid when i met you, i was still struggling to live,
i was still a kid in love romanticizing every ocean that was in between us two.
It was ages ago, when i still thought of myself as a doctor, when i still loved playing outside and witnessing the sunrise.
I don't love that anymore, because every sunrise is a new day, I'm somehow older, we're growing older, and i told you how much i feared growth,

every sunrise is a new day without you with me, and that's the biggest of my fears.
Maybe we've changed, and our hair got darker, your eyes got lighter, mine got duller, maybe that's how we're supposed to be.

Maybe the you who likes to sing the lyrics you wrote, and the me who wants to become an Oxford student and take design courses, are who we're supposed to be now.

I was a kid in love when i met you, when you were still afraid of your laugh, when i used to cover my lips when i laugh,

when we were on our pool of impulsiveness, which somehow, indirectly led us to each other.

I found myself in your messiness,

and you found yourself through cameras and movie scenes, played someone you never were, but somehow remained your golden self. Your kid self and the one whom i loved all along.

Maybe we've changed

and our faces aged a bit, maybe I faced my biggest fear when i grew older, but you were the one whom hid my eyes from seeing the earth turning upside down on this roller coaster of life.

You were with me, I wasn't with you, I was a kid when I met you, but I was nothing other than a supervisor, who watched you grow with me and wiped tears away, tears of joy.
When I saw you finding yourself the way I found myself,

in your own messiness.