Curious to know you

Kiss it better

SHIT I thought, how am I going to explain this one?

I stuttered "wwwell youu know I um, I just know her from seeing her around" I shrugged my shoulders trying to act normal. Lauren just raised her eye brows at me, deep in thought.

"tell me the truth, I don't buy that bullshit, is she an ex?"

I looked at her in shock, how could she think that I had told her there had never been anyone else. "no of course not, it's complicated I don't want...

"it's always complicated with you, just tell me for fuck sake" she had cut me off. My face was turning red rapidly as I didn't know what to do, I looked at Simon for help, but he was in deep conversation, I just stayed silent not being able to verbally speak.

"oh so I get the silent treatment, you're hiding something from me, I don't do secrets, until you figure your shit out, I'm done" I looked at her with disbelief, how could she not understand that I was not ready. With that being said she got up and left me, tears threatening to spill, I stood up clenching my face and made a bee line for the exit. Luckily, nobody had seen me leave and I was all in the clear, as soon as I had arrived home and the door was shut, I slumped against it balling my eyes out. Why did I always mess things up? Maybe she was better off without me.

The next day, I arrived at work feeling nauseous, my stomach was churning as every minute passed, I knew seeing her was going to be inevitable but still. I went to the sound desk and fulfilled all of my tasks, not long before bumping into Harry.

" Hey Camila, what happened to you last night? or should I say you have something to tell me?"

I just frowned at the thought of having to explain this awkward mess. "I don't have anything to tell you, I left early because I was tired, I hope you had a good night though" I offered him a mere smile.

"oh come on, you totally have a thing going on with Lauren, tell me all or I'm going to ask her now.."

I panicked, he can't talk to her and ask her that would make things 10x worse. "honestly, there is nothing going on". He seemed to notice the pain in my face and how uncomfortable I was.

"oh no, who fucked it up? because you two were dead cute".

"I fucked up, please just keep this between us, I don't want anyone finding out" He placed his hand on my shoulder and rubbed it soothingly.

"anything for you Mila" It was then that I noticed Lauren staring at Harry, giving him the most dirtiest look known to man, if I was none the wiser I might possibly think that she is jealous. Our gazes caught and I looked down immediately, it was really over and I had ruined everything. The day carried on and I had avoided everyone.

Hours turned into days and the final was looming closer than ever with 3 days to go, I had taken a turn for the worst and everyone had noticed. It was affecting my writing, I couldn't write at all, Simon had tried to reason with me but all that happened was that I broke down. Lauren avoided me at all costs and I did the same, she plagued my mind. Every day my routine became : wake up, go to work, go to the studio and then to bed. There was no time for anything, it was all hectic and I needed to put a stop to it.

3 Days until the final.

Everything was coming together for the show but not for me. Simon constantly checked up on me even offering to give me less tasks, but I refused, seemingly I will always pull my weight. It seemed as though Lauren was moving on from me, we hadn't interacted since that night. Work was long and boring as usual, it wasn't long until I reached the studio to meet with Rihanna as she was going to be performing her new single that I had written for her. She wanted to make sure her vocals were on point and that she had got everything right. Plus we were close friends now so being in each others company was a given.

"So have you spoken to Lauren or are you just going to keep pretending that neither of you exist?"

"I really don't have any idea what to do" I felt like pulling my hair out I was that frustrated.

"You need to sort it out, go and win her back do whatever you can, instead of sitting here feeling down, you can't let a beautiful women like that slip out of your grip seriously, get your shit together girl".

I just smiled at her, she has this way of making me believe in myself and that I might actually stand a chance of Lauren forgiving me.

"You're right, what should I do?"

"So here's the plan..."

The night ended and I was feeling so much more optimistic with what I was going to do to win Lauren back, fingers crossed it would work.

2 Days till the final.

I was getting nervous, my plan was going to be kept a secret, I wasn't even going to tell Simon. I couldn't risk it slipping and anyone finding out. Walking into the canteen to have lunch I wasn't looking where I was going until my body collided with another, feeling myself instantly heat up as i realised who it was, looking up into her emerald eyes, my heart faltered. "I'm really sorry". It sounded like I was apologising for more than just bumping into her.

"it's okay really" she half smiled at me, staring at me till her hearts content, her gaze held so much power over me. I forced myself to look away, fearing she would capture my eyes and soul.

"um so I yeah, I'll see you later" I fumbled. She just nodded as I walked off to get my food before sitting at a table alone and eating my lunch. Work was finally over and so was the day. I became introverted the next couple of days only speaking to Rihanna, I ignored Simon and everyone else to focus on what needed to be done.

Day of the final.

These last few days had passed quickly, way too quickly. The show was predicted to have the largest amount of views ever on the last show. It was a whirlwind and one hell of a ride. Looking back the beginning was so close yet so far away, how had we come to this point. Every one was running around the studio frantically, it was pure mayhem, there always was a big build up to every show and it was pretty tense. I fixed the sounded desk up to make sure it would be good for the show, there were group meetings everywhere, it was almost amazing watching what we could accomplish together as a team. I soon found myself backstage with Rihanna helping her get ready, all of her dancers were dressed in this loose white material, it wrapped around there body leaving their legs free, however their faces were covered, only the eyes could be seen. Rihanna wore thigh high boots and a body con all in grey tones.

All of the finalists had performed and it was time for Rihanna's performance. The staging was cleared, with the stage being lower than usual almost on the floor that was perfect, the audience were so close and could tell every facial expression that was going on. The lights went low, the screen turned to show Rihanna's success like it always does on the X factor, the adrenaline was pumping so high, I thought I might collapse. This could be a make or break for me.

I was dressed in the white outfit like the dancers.