Until you are mine

25. The devil's word

I was so afraid that morning. Things – things which I don't like, bad things – are happening and I don't have any control. I was crying while driving my car. Ang lakas-lakas ng kabog ng dibdib ko. I answered Tatay's call and he told me to meet him at a certain coffee shop thirty minutes after talking to him and here I am now. I am parking my car – this is actually the first time I am talking to him after five years. Kagat-kagat ko ang daliri ko habang naglalakad ako papasok sa coffee shop. I was hoping and praying that we will talk about something else – sana hindi tungkol sa amin ni Yllak – sana tungkol na lang kay Kuya Hector – sana alam na niya na magkasama ngayon sina Ate Yza.

I went inside and I saw him – sa dami ng tao sa coffee shop na iyon dapat mahirap siyang makita pero hindi – Sancho Angelo Cruise Consunji demands attention and respect. He was sitting on the table near the window – he was looking at me. Lalo akong kinabahan. Dahan-dahan akong lumapit papunta sa kanya pero napahinto ako nang biglang naupo si Kuya Yto sa tabi ni Tatay. I wanted tp cry – right there and then. I bit my lower lip.

He knows. And the reason why I am here is because of that. A tear rolled down my eyes. I don't know what to do anymore. I reached them. Yumuko ako para humalik sa pisngi niya. Hinayaan niya ako pagkatapos ay pinaupo niya ako sa harapan. Kuya Yto's eye met my gaze – he was staring me down. Hindi ko maintindihan ang kaba na nararamdaman ko. Para bang kaunti na lang ay mamamatay na ako.

Maingay ang paligid pero tahimik na tahimik kaming tatlo. Kuya Yto sighed. Tatay finally spoke.

"What is this mess, Yna?" His voice was deep. Nakakapangilabot. Dahan-dahan akong nagyuko ng ulo. Ayokong makita niyang umiiyak ako. I sighed again. I was crying. Ayokong sumagot pero alam kong kailangan.

"M-mahal kop o si Y-yllak, Tatay..." Mahinang wika ko. He sighed again.

"How could you love your brother, Yna." Kuya Yto hissed. Nagtaas ako ng tingin – their eyes were looking at me. Nakakapangilabot ang resemblance nilang dalawa. Hindi maipagkakaila na anak ni Tatay si Kuya Yto – they look so alike so much. Yto is the younger version and tatay is the years from now version ni Kuya. I bit my lower lip. Sa ganoong tingin nila ay lalo akong hindi makahinga.

"He's not my brother."

"You may not be blood related but you grew up like that, Yna. " Sabi pa ni tatay sa akin. Hindi na naman ako makapagsalita.

"Pero mahal ko siya..." Muling sabi ko.

"This is wrong, baby." Kuya Yto said. Inabot niya ang kamay ko.

"Stop calling her that, Yto Jose. She's not a baby anymore. She's a full grown woman and she already knows what is wrong. Alam kong alam mong mali ang ginagawa ninyo ni Yllak, Yna. Alam kong alam mo ang dapat gawin."

Alam ko nga. Pero ayoko. The moment I answered Tatay's call, I already know what will happen next. I already know what he's going to say. He won't ask me, he will order me. He knows that he still have power over me. Sa maikling panahon na nagbabanggaan ang emperyong tinatayo ko sa ilalim ng pangalan ni Kuya Hector at ang Consunji Empires alam kong alam ni Tatay na mapapasunod niya pa rin ako.

"P-pero ayoko..." Sabi ko. Nagtaas ako ng mukha at sinalubong ang tingin niya. "Ayoko. Hindi ko iiwan si Yllak. Hindi ko siya lalayuan. Hindi ko gagawin ang akala mong tama, Mr. Consunji." Matapang na wika ko. Kitang-kita ko ang panlalaki ng mga mata ni Kuya Yto.

"Ikaw ang nagsabi, I am a full grown woman and I know what's right from wrong. My feelings for Yllak are right and we are not on the wrong side. We're not siblings. Alam ko rin ang morality na sinasabi mo Kuya Yto, but why would I care about other people if my happiness is at stake?" Tinitigan ko si Tatay. "I was your daughter – until now, I still want to be your daughter and I'll do anything for you – but the thing is, I am not Ate Yza. Hindi ko kayang isakripisyo ang sarili kong kaligayahan just to please you."

Naningkit ang mga mata ni Tatay habang titig na titig sa akin. I stared at him too. Hindi ko alam kung anong iniisip niya pero wala akong pakialam. Hindi ko iiwan si Yllak. I took a deep breath. Tumayo ako at saka nagpaalam na. I was about to walk away when I heard him said something.

"I'll put Helios Demitri back to jail, Leighton if you don't leave Yllak and the family alone."

My lips parted. I looked back and there I saw not the father I loved and respected but the devil in the corporate suit and I realized that I just lost the fight....

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"What? Si Yna?"

Kunot na kunot ang noo ni Yvo habang titig na titig sa akin. Kuyom na kuyom naman ang palad ko. Ikinuwento ko sa kanya ang nangyari sa amin ni Kuya Yto kaninang umaga sa bahay ni Ate Yza. I knew already who told him. Hindi ko naman na kailangan itanong pa, alam kong si Ares ang nagsabi noon sa kapatid ko para lalo kaming magkasira ni Yna. I was just glad that my baby is strong enough and that she is willing to fight with me.

"Kapatid natin si Yna." Sabi niN Yvo. Tumayo ako. I was on his room. I shook my head.

"We both know that she's not our sister." I sighed. Hinarap ko si Yvo. Yvo was standing near the window – looking out – hindi ko alam kung anong tinitingnan niya. I walked beside him tapos ay binatukan ko siya. He faced me.

"Mas matanda ako sa'yo!" He hissed.

"Ano ba kasing tinitingnan mo diyan?" Tanong ko. Binuksan ko nang malaki ang glass door at lumabas sa balcony niya. Nabalitaan ko na nitong huling mga linggo ay sa mansyon na muli umuuwi si Yvo. Ang buong akala ko kasi doon pa rin siya sa unit niya nakatira but I was wrong. The maid told me that Yvo always goes home and I am wondering why.

"Break nab a kayo ni Fauna?" Biglaang tanong ko.

"Nope. But she's in Germany." He said again. Tinanaw ko ang tinatanaw ni Yvo.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" I asked again. He looked at me.

"You know who lives there now?" He seemed puzzled. I shook my head. "Si Thea."

Slowly I looked at him. Si Thea? "Iyong ex mong mataba?"

"Hindi siya mataba! Big boned nga!" Binatukan din ako ni Yvo. Napailing na lang ako. "She's in there with her husband. They don't have kids. I wonder why."

"Bakit ba napunta sa'yo bigla?" I asked. "I'm the one telling you my problems." Sabi ko na lang. Yvo grinned.

"Mas gwapo kasi ako." We both sighed.

"Hindi ka ba galit sa akin?" Biglang tanong ko. "Yto seemed pretty mad at me." Inakbayan ako ni Yvo. He's being a big brother now. Ngumiti siya at saka huminga nang napakalalim.

"Hindi ko naman hawak ang desisyon mo. You are my brother, whatever it is that you want to do, do it. If you love, Yna or Leigh or baby, love her. Love your woman, respect her, treat her like a queen and at night make love to her like a porn star, baby bro!"

I ended up laughing with him. Nahinto lang ang tawanan namin nang mapansin ko ang isang silver na Ferrari na pumarada sa tapat. Bumaba mula doon si Ares. Naikuyom ko ang mga palad ko, akmang tatalikod ako nang mahagip ng tingin ko si Yna. Kitang-kita kong papalapit siya kay Ares. Ares stopped.

My eyes widened when I saw Yna kissed Ares. My lips parted. My heart stopped beating. They were French kissing each other in broad daylight while I stood there in the balcony – motionless and slowly dying....