Ethan's P.O.V
Maybe the universe is telling me none of this was supposed to happen. I was stupid enough to believe his pathetic lies.
I can't believe it was him all along. All the times he couldn't come over or hang out, he was with Anthony. All the times he was always smiling at his phone. It was him.
It was never me and I know that now.
The pressure on my knuckles was becoming unbearable so I finally decided to stop. I push my now soaked hair out of my face and grab my belongings off the shimmering wet grass. I could hardly pick up my feet at the pain I was feeling. I feel a vibrating sensation in the pocket of my black leather jacket. I reach my bloody, shaking hand towards my pocket and quickly realized it's my phone.
7 missed calls from Grapeson
122 new messages from Grapeson
I pull my notification colum at the top of the screen down and see a permanent notification.
Grapeson has your location services on
My eyes focus on the notification as my vision still blurs. A song pops into my head.
Send me your location
let's focus on communicating
Cause I just need the time and place to come through
I begin to sing those lyrics over and over as I process everything that happened today.
The words barley leave my mouth but still create some sort of melodic tone.
I didn't wanna fall for you
Gather my attention It was all for you
These words are enough to send me over the edge. Words maybe something simply spoken to you but they mean so much more.
I make my way into my house hurting my knuckles even more by shattering a framed picture of me and Grayson. It's not like it meant anything to him though.
I took a quick glance at my surroundings only to find I broke everything breakable in the house including myself. I'm breakable and he broke me with five simple words.
I find my way to my bathroom and slam the door making a loud 'BANG' sound. My legs take control of my body and soon enough, I'm standing in front of my mirror fiddling with a dark grey square shaped thin razor blade.
I look at myself. Not just my outer appearance but everything. Single tears find their way down my already tear stained cheeks. I look broken. I feel broken. I am broken.
I have no reason to live anymore so why waste my life making mistakes when he made the biggest one of all.
He can't keep my heart from being damaged even though he told me he'd protect my heart from any damage that could ever find its way to my heart. They say 'promises are meant to be broken' but are they really?
What's the point of promise rings if promises are meant to he broken? He broke one too many promises.
I walk to my bathtub and turn the water on letting the sound of water hitting the floor of the bathtub fill the room. I walk back to my mirror letting the bathtub fill behind me.
It's not like anyone would care if you did this
No one's here to stop you
Just kill yourself
Your mother is not here to save you
Your father is in jail for murder
Your brother is out dealing drugs
You had Grayson and that was it. He was your one and only. Your ride or die. Your other half. He meant everything to you. You truly loved him.
The bathtub finishes filling. I take one last look at myself in the mirror and turn around. This may be the last time I ever see myself. I leave myself clothed and step into the bathtub one leg at a time. The water making my clothes even more soaked than they already where from the rain.
I lay with my legs out in front of me and I have my wrist layed out on either side of the bathtub. Both wrist facing upward. I continue fiddling with the razer blade with my left hand. I finally decide this is it.
I'm leaving
I have absolutely nothing to live for
I wrote a note to the people I truly love before I decided to do this.
I hesitately move the razor blade to my wrist resting it on my cold skin.
I'm about to push the blade into my skin until I hear the door slam open and a male voice from downstairs.
"ETHAN PLEASE DON'T DO THIS." I hear Grayson scream. The sound of his voice makes even more burning tears fall down my face.
I hear giant footsteps running up the stairs. It's him. Please grayson, don't make this harder than it already is.
The bathroom door slams open revealing Grayson with bloodshot eyes, messy hair, and tear stained cheeks. The tears only flow harder by the sight of him.
He quickly runs up to me and grabs the razor blade out of my hand and chucks it to the ground.
"GRAYSON PLEASE DON'T." I scream reaching my hand towards the razor blade on the ground.
Grayson doesn't hesitate to get in the bathtub with me fully clothed. He grabs both of my hands and intertwines them with mine. I flinch at his soft touch.
He looks into my eyes and all I see is regret, Sorrow, and guilt.
His lips part meaning he's about to speak.
"Ethan please don't do this. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean any of the things I said. You mean everything to me and I swear to God I would die for you. I love you with all my heart and I truly mean that. It kills me to see you like this. It physically, mentally and emotionally kills me to see you in this much especially knowing I'm the one who caused it. I mean every word I'm saying. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to hold you when your hurting. I want to be the one to guide you through all your hard times. I want to look at our kids one day and smile knowing that's our child and no one else's. I want to kneel down in front of you and say will you marry me with tears in my eyes because I'll be with the love of my life forever. Please don't do this Ethan. I love you so much." Grayson says with full on tears in his eyes.
"G-grayson I-I love y-you too." I say leaning forward crying into his chest.
Those words were truly heart warming.
If you love someone, never let them go at any cost. Be forgiving when they make a mistake because no is perfect and everyone makes mistakes but if it's the one, he or she will be your definition and image of perfection.
If you love someone, love them unconditionally and never let them go. Never leave their side and hold them when they need to be comforted. Help them through all the hard times. Be there for them even when it seems like there's nothing else to do.
If you love someone, never let them go.
______________
GUESS WHAT? THIS HAS A HAPPY ENDING.
I'M SO PROUD OF MYSELF
