And all Along It Was You

s e v e n

AUTHORS NOTE:
literally have nothing to say but enjoy while I go enjoy my birthday cake!

Thank you to Audrey and Ruby who helped my indecisive self decide on an instrumental song! Pretty Please turn on your volume up if you wanna listen, trust me it makes it better! <3
Song: Human by Christina Perri

oOo
s e v e n

I slammed Matthews apartment door
without a concern and slid until I reached the carpet. He had literally scared the crap out of Ashton. Not only him but a job opportunity that would have benefited me.
My head was in confusion, not knowing how to react what had just happened out there.
Her voice made me bring my eyes up to meet hers. I had forgotten she was here.

"Hey you alright?" Cora asks

No I'm not. Not at all. I'm depressed. I have anxiety.
My biggest fear is not finding a way out of this.
My own maze.
It's like I'm trapped inside of myself.
It's like everyday I get more tangled and twisted. And it's like I don't make an improvement everyday.
The maze keeps on growing with alternative pathways that I don't know an escape to.
I want to tell someone.
Maybe I should tell you.
I need someone to hug me, tell me it's all going to be alright.
I want to spill out everything. Never have I dealt with something more difficult than my own soul. But what if I tell you everything and you reject me? What if you think I'm just asking for attention?
And It's my own maze
But it's my own soul.

I'm fine, just tired. Thanks though."
I assured lying through my teeth and pushing my clouding thoughts away.

"Applying for jobs is very tough sometimes you know h-"  I cut her of before another peep came out of her.

"Okay. I know." The words blurted out of me. This woman was seriously not intending to come out annoying or anything of that for the matter, but she was irritating me so much. I know she wanted to make me feel better but I didn't need her to console me at least not her.

"I wonder what's taking Matthew so long." Cora repeated apprehensively.

Hmm I wonder too. Why he's been acting like this. He thought I was playing? Did he think my feelings for him are a way of playing around? But did he even know I feel for him?

"I'm gonna go see Vera okay?"
I ask waiting for her to respond.

She shot me a "can I trust you look" and hesitated to say "go ahead."

Truth is, I got up to avoid an encounter with Matthew when he walked in.
At this moment one of the only things that could make me smile and laugh was the ray of sunshine in front of my eyes.
She brightened my hazel eyes, and made me see in a whole new color.
Her smile lit my world from the instance I saw her glow.

"Barbie! You're bwack!"
She said as she clinched onto my leg

"I don't break promises with a princess like you!" I say kneeling down to stroke her hair.

"Let's pway then Elle!"
It was the first time I heard her actually say my name, it felt good that she knew it and she trusted me, her blue diamond eyes were filled with happiness, because she knew nothing but happiness.
This child was a mirror image of Matthew.
Filled with innocence and so vulnerable.