Not Romeo and Juliet

Chapter 14: Fallen

this is my favorite chapter!

********************

Have you ever been to an ocean before the night falls? It's a mixture of colors. Light blue, dark blue, silver and grey. It's silent. It's sad. It's lonely and broken.

Stephenie Meyer calls that twilight. Cassandra Clare calls it the blue hour and I call it the look Ash gives to his mother's dead body.

Even though I didn't knew Elen for long, she was a total mother for me. The pain Ash feels now most be unbearable.

that is why I am frozen in the doorway of her hospital room, with Ash crouched in front of her bed.

"Ash." I softly whisper. His head snaps up and he stands up immediately. I take hurried steps to him and throw my arms around him. He presses me to himself and buries his head in the crook of my neck.

I don't know how long we stayed like that and I dint care. Not when I could feel Ash trembling in my hands like he was about to break. We turned when I heard someone clear their throat, my hand captured in his.

Lizzy looks at us with tears in her eyes. "they have to take her now." Ash merely nods.

He walks to her, letting go of my hand and kisses her forehead. "if there is a world after this one, let me be a better son for you."

I feel a hand creep into mine and see that it's Liz's. she wipes away the tears on my face - which I didn't even know that they were there - and mouths to me a he'll be alright.

The thing is, I'm not afraid of Ash not being all right, he could go through anything.

I was afraid that this would wake my demons and then they would crawl out slowly from my darkness that I so desperately tried to avoid.

I push those thoughts away, kneel in front of her and take her cold hand in mine. "I will keep my promise." I whisper softly to her.

Next thing I know, we're at her funeral and they are burying her. A few words are said in her honor but Ash stays silent the whole time, not taking his eyes off of his mother's dead body that now is placed in a wooden box and under the dark soil.

After it starts raining heavily, everyone begins to leave until it's just me and Ash whom sits next to her grave.

I take out my umbrella and use it to protect us from the rain.

"leave me alone." Ash mutters darkly.

"what?" I ask, shocked.

"leave me the fuck alone, Juliet!" he says, standing up, his eyes ablaze. "why are you still here? You've seen that my life is nothing but misery. You've seen that I'm probably unrepairable. So why bother? I'm giving you an out. And yes, Juliet. This is the part where you say I don't want this sort of life. This is the part where you say you don't want a fucking poor excuse of a human being."

"no." I barely keep my voice from shaking.

"why?" he hisses. "give me one damned reason that is not for me but for you."

The words leave my lips before I give them permission.

"because I see you every fucking time I stare at the ocean. Because I am in love with you, you moron!"

******************************

"the person you think of when you're standing in front of the ocean, that's the person you're in love with."

******************************

next chapter will be a letter!!!!! tell me what you thought of this chapter! is it your favorite too? ;) getting close to Juliet's demons by the chapter. feel the air that everything is going to turn out bad? huh? i don't either. :P

with love, always.

-Ani