Lies and Fear

Chapter 4: Ashamed

Kian

Is all the love worth the pain?

Aqua

Just after Sam passed away I wrote a poem. It was so heartbreaking when I re-read it, somehow it made me feel sad, as if I wasn’t the only one to loose a sister, a friend.

You look so peaceful lying there

Your hair done

Tucked behind one ear.

I remember

When once you told me

Heavens a nice place

A pace where you are free.

I thought at the time

You said it to comfort me

But now I remember

As I watch you

So still

So silent.

With you a part of me has gone

I cannot bear to say

So long

Good by

It’s feels to final

To ending

As if

I shall never again see you

But I hope

And I pray

That just once

Some day

I will awaken

To find you standing there

Looking down upon me

Caressing my hair

But until then my dear sister

I bid you farewell

Until we meet again

In heaven

In paradise

In the place where we are free

Where we can be together

Forever

You and me

Sam, he found out your secret. What you were doing. I know you didn’t have a choice, I know. But he didn’t, he didn’t want to know he didn’t want to understand. Really Sam he loved you. But he felt betrayed, like you had abandoned him, left him on purpose.

He made me take your place Sam.

Two weeks had past since the music room incident. Kian and Cean had pretty much the same relationship as when I had first arrived. Mika and me didn’t really get along. She made no move to friendship and neither did I. I was happy though. We stayed out of each other’s way. Not really talking unless we had to but it wasn’t like we argued or anything. Really I think she was just creped out by the fact that I never talked and hated being around big crowds.

Kian, so far my attempt to figure him out had ended in zilch, zero, nothing. I knew he hated people. He hated people touching him; He hated talking to anyone and everyone. He had no friends, and since he had started the school he hadn’t gone home once. That must be years. But why?

There were a few things I needed to ask him. Who was his roommate? It was none of my business but no one I asked knew or didn’t want to talk about it. Like it was some forbidden subject.