This Is Heartache On The Big Screen ~ A 5 Seconds Of Summer Fanfic

Chapter 4 ~ Words I Never Said

The storyline of the plot finishes for a moment and a young woman's face is shown on the film. I look over at Mikey who gives me a nod of reassurance, as if to say 'keep watching'.

She has tons of long blonde hair that cascades down her back like a fast flowing waterfall and blue eyes like the water in the waterfall. She looks like Sofia, like Sofia's older sister. The eyes and hair are the same but the features are more pronounced, her cheekbones are defined and her soft brown eyebrows are more arched than before.

"My mom never liked him. Ashton, I mean. She always used to say that he was trouble, that he would break my heart. But, she was wrong. I broke my own heart that day I left. I told her that Ashton and I didn't work out and he was gonna focus on his career." She explains to the camera. "I wonder what she would do if she knew that I broke his heart and my own. I think she'd just blame him." She takes a deep breath and turns to someone off camera"You're showing Ash this, right?"

A voice confirms her question with a gruff yes.

"Ash, I don't have the courage to say this to your face but... I miss you. And nothing hurts more than knowing I'm a bit more than a little too late. I can't take back what I never told you. Things like why I left never got told, things that you deserved to know and I kept them quiet. I said to myself that I was too busy to tell you. I told myself that I didn't care, that you weren't even that necessary. Ash, I was wrong and every time your songs play on the radio I think you deserve to know that my heart skips a beat. That I pretend it's me that you call up every night at ten, even though it is probably some girl you know but I still wish it was me.

"And if you were stood in front of me now I couldn't do this but you're not so I can say what I need to tell you. Ash, I lost you a while ago but it's important that you know that a part of my heart will always be yours and I'll always hold a special part of my heart for you, even if I never see you again. It'll always be there, waiting. Just in case."

I feel a tiny tear rolling down my cheek and use the back of my hand to brush it gently away. I look up to see Sofia, on screen, doing the same. Her light turquoise eyes blurred with the salty water and tear tracks run slowly down her face. Seeing her like this makes my heart break a little and remembering us makes me fall a little in love again.

Sofia will always have a place in my heart because I'll never forget how she looked at seventeen, how she laughed at everything. She's right we can't take back all the things we never said to each other, I never said 'I love you' enough, sure, I said it but not enough that it's something ingrained in her head. I could count every time I said it on three hands, thirteen times. That's all. In eleven months. That's not every night, that's not even everyday. And I will always regret that.

Luke looks across at me and I think maybe, for once, he feels bad for me. He might even know what I'm thinking about. He knows that I didn't say those three small words often and he knows that I was too scared to. So perhaps he can put two and two together and figure it out.

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Sofia's back but she's seventeen again and she's laughing uncontrollably, someone with bracelets decorating their tanned wrists is tickling her and laughing as well. It's me. I haven't seen my face but I know because I remember is time.

"Ash, stop." She gasps in between squeals. My tickling subsides and she softly pants from laughing too hard. "Ash, I can see us." My face looks really confused, I know. "Together, living in a house with a beautiful garden. I'm not pushing Ashton, I'm just letting you know. I want us to last."

"I want us to last as well, Sofs. Let's not think too hard about the future though?" She smiles and we curl up side by side just holding hands on top of the hill watching the stars light up the midnight sky.