That Ship Has Sailed

John & Sherlock II

When John woke, he had no concept of day or night. He blinked a few times, startled when he saw where he was, and jumped when he saw Sherlock standing in the hallway.

"Christ--" he mumbled, "Sherlock, you scared me."

"I'm sorry, John," Sherlock mumbled.

"What?" John asked, startled.

"I said, I'm sorry. I never meant to make you re-live what you've been through and it was selfish of me to do so. I hope you'll one day forgive me."

John watched as Sherlock turned and began to go back to his room.

"Sherlock," he said quickly, stopping him from leaving. Sherlock turned and John continued, "I don't care about the past. I care about you and your future. I worry that I won't be here next time this happens and I won't catch you in time."

Sherlock looked away.

"What can I do to ensure you stay safe?" John pleaded, "Tell me and I'll do it."

Sherlock looked back up at John, staring for a few seconds, then said, "Stay."

"What?"

"Stay here. With me. I'm better with you, John."

John was startled, but paused, laying back and staring at the ceiling for a few moments. Sherlock walked closer and lay with him, resting his head on his chest. John was startled, but as soon as Sherlock relaxed, his arms went around him to hold him closer. Sherlock buried his face in John's sweater and let out a gentle breath.

"I need you, John."

John was heartbroken, but knew he couldn't say no. He could never leave Sherlock like this. Even when his mood evened out and he got clean again, he knew he would only relapse if he left, so, John nodded and whispered, "Okay."

Sherlock looked up at him with a glimmer of hope in his eyes.

"Okay," John repeated.

Sherlock rested his head back on John's chest and John buried his face in Sherlock's curls. He then surprised himself and Sherlock when he puckered his lips and placed a kiss on Sherlock's head. Neither moved or spoke, but neither felt embarrassed, either. John grinned and did it one more time before closing his eyes again and drifting back into a comfortable sleep with Sherlock in his arms.