Baby Wants It

Chapter 6: V-Day

I had a fitful night, to say the least, unable to settle into a deep sleep after Jamie dropped his bombshell on me. The only response I could get out of him was, "We discussed that Max would likely be our last. I'm just taking care of business before we have to travel."

"We said she MIGHT be our last. I think it's too soon for us to make that decision."

"Sleep, baby. We can talk about this more tomorrow." With a kiss to the back of my head, he rolled over to his own restless night. Normally, he sleeps like the dead, but ever since he brought Max and I home from the hospital, he's been up two and three times a night.

I rub the sleep from my eyes as I take in the sight of my gorgeous husband, fresh from the shower, cuddling a fussy Max. "Guess who wants her breakfast a little early this morning, Mama." He comes to sit beside me while I unfasten my nursing gown and reach for her. He snuggles her into me and she latches on like a starving piglet. I give a little gasp and then settle more comfortably on my side to watch her nurse. He smiles at us both and leans over to peck my lips. "You look beautiful, love. Can I get you anything?"

I smile back at him. "Just you? Snuggle with us?"

He beams, "Don't have to ask me twice." He climbs in behind me and rests his head on his propped up arm so he can look down on both of us. He reaches over to let Max grip one of his fingers and he plants a sweet kiss to my head. "This is one of those perfect life moments," he whispers. We both enjoy the quiet contentment until it's time to roll over so Max can nurse on the other side. He holds her and burps her while I get myself situated and take her back for round two. We are facing each other now with the baby between us and he fingers my hair as he watches her in awe.

"Are we going to talk about the elephant in the room?"

He chuckles, trying to put me off, "Well, she IS growing like a weed, but I wouldn't call her an elephant...."

"Jamie....."

"Sweetheart, I don't know what you want me to say. I don't want to put you at risk ever again. This is a sure fire way to avoid it. So I'm doing it."

"Put me at risk?"

"Baby, what part of you almost died do you not understand? I'm not putting either one of us through that ever again."

I can't help but scoff a little, "I think that's a little dramatic and what happened with Max was a fluke. There is nothing to suggest it would happen again."

He sets his jaw in that way I know means he is reaching his limit and climbs out of bed to head to the closet. "Drop it, Dakota."

I begin to fume, "I most certainly will not drop it. You can't just make a command decision that affects our entire family and expect me to accept it, especially when you're being irrational."

He pulls one of his golf polos over his head and stares me down with cold eyes. "You need to be calm when you're nursing her. If you want to hash this out to your exacting standards, we can do it later, but not now." He heads toward the door. "I'll get breakfast going. Dad and Samina will be here in about an hour."

Good, maybe I can get his Dad to talk some sense into him. He has a golf date with his dad, my dad, and Jasper. Samina is going to hang out and help me with the kids. I need some time with her. I'm hoping she can help me figure out how to get Jamie back into a good head space so that we can be intimate again.

*****

Freshly showered, I settle Max into her crib, grab the baby monitor and head downstairs after peeking in on Rose and Trey, who are both still snoring. I arrive just as Jim and Samina are coming in, loaded down with gifts and groceries. Samina comes over to give me a big hug. "Lord, girl, you look like a million bucks! I've never seen a Mommy who bounces back as quickly as you do." She gives me a kiss on both cheeks and heads to the kitchen. "I brought the fixings for your favorite casserole. I'm hoping you'll let me cook in your fabulous kitchen today." She turns to wink at me, "and I'll make you a chocolate cheesecake too." God, I love this woman. She knows exactly what I need.