Messy Love (Ed Sheeran)

I'm Drunk because I Miss You

|[ED SHEERAN POV]|

Ooh how I miss you

My symphony played the song that carried you out

Ooh how I miss you

And I, I miss you and I wish you'd stay

Do you ever wonder if the stars shine out for you?

Float down

Like autumn leaves

Hush now

Close your eyes before the sleep

And you're miles away

And yesterday you were here with me

I have never felt so emotionally recked when performing this song. I looked at Taylor, who's eyes rose in question.

I shrugged, feeling back for the mic. The crowd roaring in my ears, the usual ringing...

"Thank you guys so much. You guys are wonderful." I lifted my lips into a smile, waving off the crowd before I slipped backstage.

"Hey, are you alright Ted?" Taylor abruptly held my shoulder. Why did I wish that was Barbara?

"Uh, yeah. Of course. Just a little tired that's all," I shrugged,  letting out a small chuckle.  Taylor eyed me for a second, before pursing her lips.

"You need to sleep more. No more night owl for you!" she scowled, begore giggling. I laughed,  even though inside I wanted to break down.

"Well,  Imma' go wait in my dressing room until the fans thin out near the tour bus," I signaled.

Taylor nodded, smacking me playfully before waving off and away into the mysterious.  Just kidding, she went to her own dressing room.

I didn't even sit down.. I just went straight into the refreshments and picked up the rum I had snuck in... and drank the night away. I had over five cups of rum by now... and it was barely 1 am.

Then that song came up that I had written for Alice, but now felt more connected to with Barbara.

Maybe I'll get drunk again...

I walked back into the main room, slouching into the couch as I slid out my phone from my pocket. A cling of metal hit the ground. I looked down to see what it was.

I pursed my lips as I picked up the piece of metal... the piece of metal that now meant the world to me.

Barbara's promise ring.

I sighed, pouting as I looked at the cieling.

Even though her and I had the most difficult relationships known to man kind, I knew somehow, that I loved her a lot more than I had anyone else.

I held the ring that I had in my pocket... hiding my love, like I'm embarrassed of it or something.

But I'm not.

I came up with a brilliant idea, an idea that hopefully Barbara would see somehow, and she'll know that I still love her.

I walked out of my room, and dragged my way to Taylor's room, before I noticed it was empty. I was pretty sure she must be in her tour bus out front...

Where can I buy a chain? Maybe a fabric one even.. I can go out and deal with fans... or I can go to the hippie shop across the street... but fans might still find me... shit.

Fuck it, I'm going.

I dragged my drunken arse outside, and it was pretty cold.. I looked around, the street a little more less straight than it should be. Yeah, a little more less straight. That makes sense.

I walked across the streat... oops, type. I mean tyop. typo.

God dammit, I hate but love being drunk.

Anyways, I ran across the street, yells from a group of girls sent me cursing under my breath.

I stopped at the front of the door, mentally facepalming myself when I realized it was fucking past 1 am, and they were closed.

"Oh my god. Ed, I love you so much. I loved your concert-" the girls came to me, and I turned around, smiling happily. I felt for my neck until I literally mentally punched myself.

I have my black fabric necklace on.. I can just put the ring on this one. DUH.

"Hi, lovelies. Do you guys mind helping me out," I slurred, and the two brunettes up front smiled. 

"Hold on," I said as I began to small talk with them, making them laugh every now and then.

I took off the necklace, untying it before I slid the ring into it, the girls watching me in silence, one of them holding a camera.

"Can you tie this back?" I said to the blue eyed girl who wore my merch, my plus sign on her cheek. She giggled before nodding, and I turned around and felt her fingers on my neck. 

That tickles a bit. Haha.

I turned around when she finished, taking photos with each of them.

"Who's ring is that?" one of them asked. I rose an eyebrow, turnng to the side to let out a burp from the alcohol.

"Oh, well-" I tried to look at it.. but I couldn't. Fucking neck...

"It's Barbara's promise rieng. It was meant for her to stay pure, but I took her purity, you see." I blabbered, not even thinking.

"So I'm keeping this ring to show how much I care," I felt the metal at my neck, wanting to cry as I pursed my lips.

"I miss her," I mumbled, the girls around me whispering to each other.

"You guys aren't together anymore?!" one of them seemed so upset. I looked around the group of girls, two of them holding phones up to me... Where they recording?

I nodded my head sadly, and a few of them awww'ed.

"Wow. I can't believe Barbara would do such a thing. I mean, my poor baby. He's drunk because he's sad. That's why he got emotional tonght when he sang that song.." they began conversing. They were all pretty upset now..

Oh no.. I don't want them to think Barbara's the bad one...

"No- I don't -"

"Teddy?" I heard a voice call. I looked up, my vision blurry, but the blonde hair and long legs causing relief.

"Taylor!" I waved, before I shuffled awkwardly across the street, a bunch of fans surrounding her. Paparazzi having a camera on her, before he shuffled past me.

"Tedd, you smell horrible. Let's get going, dude. You shouldn't get drunk and be out like this alone. You're going to get raped." Taylor deadpanned.

I chuckled, before she scowled and send her arm around my shoulder, leading me back to the bus.

I felt the ring at my neck, and when I turned around, I could see the girls gossiping, talking to the pap man.. I hope they didn't record everything I said.. That'd be a really bad thing.