Harmony’s P.O.V:
How did I let it get this far… how did I let him get to the point where only a couple words that had fallen from his mouth would make me feel like I had been stabbed in the chest multiple times. He’s destroyed me, utterly and completely made my emotional state go into a place that only a nurse from a psychiatric ward would be able to handle…. Why did I think that he could change or that I was different? That we were different. I’m stupid that’s why, I thought we might have had something, had something that changed him inside. But we didn’t and that’s exactly why it’s been a pathetic 2 days that have past full of self-pity.
Luckily it’s been the weekend, so it has been a nice two days sitting on the couch watching sad movies including my all-time favourite the note book. I may have downed at least 2 tubs of ice-cream and have not visited the gym in at least 4 days, so you could say I’m starting to look almost like a pregnant lady when she’s 8 months due. Okay that might have been an overreaction, but that’s what I feel like and I am twice an emotional as she would be as well. Why wouldn’t I be though, I feel like my tiny beating heart has been ripped out and cut into two.
Pathetic I know…. I obviously didn’t realise how deep I was until the nasty words fell from his lips stinging every sore spot of my entire body. It might not have been the reason that I did admit I liked harry, but it could have been because he was the only person I had started trusting in a long time and managed to open up to in a matter of days. That’s what probably hurt the most knowing that, that spring finally bounced back into my face just like I knew it would, after he told me over and over again that he wouldn’t let it.
But it happened, and I can’t explain how much I want to go up to him and just yell in his face. Scream, yell, abuse him for promising me it wouldn’t spring back, that I wouldn’t get hurt. But he’s made his decision, and there nothing that’s gunna change his mind. So the one thing I’m trying to convince myself to do is just forget about him, lose all hope. It’s over, he was a section of my imagination for the innocent little girl in the back of my mind. But she’s dead now and the thought of him is to….
He was only the extra bits you can order on top of your ice-creams, I didn’t need him. I only thought I wanted him. But it turns out he made me sick and was worst for me than I thought.
It’s a dull, sad Monday morning and I am mid-way of getting ready before my doorbell rings. Who could possibly be at my door this time in the morning? I really can’t be bothered talking to some random, my mind and my emotional state is not stable at the moment and I am mid-way through my makeup, making me look like a half ready clown….
I run down the stairs carefully, avoiding another fall and make my way down to the door. When I open it I’m surprised to see yet again Kylie standing there with a few letters in her hands. Her hairs is messy, her eyes are droopy and she is still in her trackies and jumper. Why did she come over then?
“Uh hi.” I say trying to put on a happy Monday morning smile, but I don’t thinks she’s buying it.
“Here. Again.” She groans shoving the two letters in her hand right into my stomach, making me bend over a little grabbing the letters in a hurry. She storms off as soon as she releases them.
“Bittccchhh.” I groan under my breath as I slam the door behind me. Why did she do that? What is so annoying about receiving a few stray letters in the mail? Whatever her problem is, I hope she gets over it quickly.
I chuck the letters on the table and make my way back up the stairs rubbing over the spot she hit me so hard in. Stupid Kylie.
“Hey sexy.” Lea jokes and sends me a playful wink as she walks towards the counter I am currently serving at.
“How many times do I have to tell you not to say that?” I wink back at her leaning my body up against the counter. She lets out a small laugh as she jumps onto the counter top opposite from me, looking around quickly to make sure Roxy’s out of sight.
