|Damage||cth| -au- DISCONTINUED

|Thirty|

I truly don't really know where to start but I truly lost all motivation and it's honestly because I'm not into 5sos/I genuinely don't give a fuck about about them anymore. And before I get attacked, it's genuinely not because of the album not being released. It's because I've grown up and the fandom has become so hateful and it's made me loose my interest in participating in it. No, this doesn't mean that I'm discontinuing this book. I just thought I should let you know where my heads space is at. My goal is to finish both books before the new year and see where I want to take this into the New Year. I need to re-evaluate my priorities and re-invigorate my love for music and appreciate of this band. I don't know where I'm at. I will continue writing until it's finished. I'm passionate about the writing but I'm not passionate about the band if that makes sense. I'm in this for the music and not for the people. I don't necessarily think 5SOS have changed for the better or for the worse but as they grow up, so do I and I never thought I'd ever be in a phase of life where I don't really care about them. Also, an important announcement at the end of this chapter is waiting.
- SK

Calum:
"Go home," Arizona told me.

"I know I'm not everyone's favorite person right now but I just wanna talk to her," I begged. Before I could even get another word out, the door slammed right in front of my face. "Please."

Suddenly the door was opened and Arizona rolled her eyes and smirked at me.

"Five minutes only and if Aria's sleeping, don't even bother. She's had a long day," she demands.

"I knew you just wanted to hear me beg."

"Shut up," she says as she pulls me into their house. "I'm serious Calum...make it quick. Dave's coming soon."

I pushed past Dakota and ran up the stairs to Aria's room. I had almost forgotten how well I knew this house. Weirdly enough, I haven't been in Aria's room and I didn't exactly know why I was here. Without knocking, I opened the door. Aria was sitting on the floor with books all over the floor and notebook in her hands. Writing away, she was catching up on school. She looked up at me and I noticed tears on her face. Aria didn't make a sound, unusual but I was used to it by now.

I'm not exactly an icebreaker kinda guy so I just stood there. At the sight of me, she wiped her face and blew her nose with a tissue nearby.

"Hey," I mumbled. "You look busy. I guess I should go."

"Well...you came all this way for something."

"Just wanted to talk I guess and check up...on you." I trailed off.

"You what?" She asked. I was practically whispering. I was so ashamed. She'd gone to my house to check on me after the terrible things I've done, after everything I've done.

"I wanted to check on you," I say not much louder.

"I can't hear you. You're gonna have to speak u—"

"I wanted to check on you!" I yelled.

"I'm fine," she looked at me briefly before looking back down at her papers.

"I don't know how long you can keep this up. This whole 'I'm fine' thing. You're gonna break."

"What do you know?" she snapped. "You're gonna break," she mocked.

"I don't know why I wasted my time coming here."

"There's the door," she pointed. I held onto her door handle and opened her door as slowly as possible. Aria seemed completely unbothered by me leaving. She didn't even look up. Hoping she would stop me, I stopped myself.

"Hey..." I said.

"Hi?" she said in a questioning tone.

"I'm sorry for being a dick."