the signs as the things i heard on the first day of school:
Aries: what's your white mom name? wait never mind you don't get to decide, you're definitely a Carol.
Taurus: Anyone dare me to shove this scissors in my eye? no? i'm doing it anyway
Gemini: time isn't real i swear to god this bus ride is two hours long
Cancer: i'm going to cry if he says another word about lunch
Leo: THAT'S A POTTY WORD
Virgo: i'm so glad i'm a twin, the world needs more of my genes
Libra: your locker is jammed? the stuff in there is probably too big. did you put your ego in there?
Scorpio: is the next paragraph in the health class syllabus about [snicker] s-e-x?
Sagittarius: I don't trust gingers anymore. one's smiling and it's the first day of school.
Capricorn: my pencil case just fell off the top of the bleachers. god, i wish that were me.
Aquarius: shove that water bottle up your ass
Pisces: [while making a name tag] hand me that marker, i'm gonna draw the void
