Scars (A Jaegan Fan Fic)

Live for me?

*no one's POV*

Bryce and Dylan made an agreement, well... more like Dylan told Bryce what was gong to happen and threatened him. Bryce wasn't allowed to tell Jackson or anyone else what happened that night except for that everyone got drunk and passed out.

Bryce had several bruises and cuts but blamed it on him falling down the stairs. Dylan went off being happy with Jackson and feeling no pain or remorse for anyone else.

Justin was breaking inside.

*Justin's POV*

Death.

That was the only thing that was on my mind.

This was all my fault. The whole situation was my fault. If I didn't go over to Bryce's house then I wouldn't of upset Dylan. Bryce wouldn't of gotten beaten up and knocked out and I wouldn't of gotten my virginity taken away from me and of gotten roofied.

I felt all alone. I couldn't face raegan cause it just reminded me of how bad I felt for lying to him. I couldn't face Kale or Jack cause they reminded me of Raegan. I couldn't face Bryce, mikey or Jackson and especially not Dylan. 

Everything was planned out for me. This was going to be my last week alive. After that, I was going to end my life and that was that.

My dad had to stay in Minnesota for a while longer than expected to figure things out with Daniel and I had to stay here alone.

I posted a few musical.ly's in black and white with captions of sad lyrics and blamed it on 'acting' but in reality, that's how I felt. The only acting I was doing was acting like I was ok.

A knock was heard at my door as I got up and opened it. There stood Kale, Jack, and Raegan.

Kale and Jack could tell I wasn't alright. I had puffy eyes and a tear stained face. I was wearing a long sleeved shirt to disguise my bandages that covered my cuts. They both started tearing up just at the sight of me.

Then my eyes shifted to Raegan. I realized his tear stained face and puffy eyes. You could see the pain in his eyes just like you could see the pain in mine. Seeing him in pain made me tear up all over again. I really did love him but I was terrified to admit that it was more than just a friend love. Then Raegan's eyes met mine.

Once our eyes met we both started crying and I ran into his arms, he picked me up and wrapped my legs around his waist and carried me to the couch. Kale and jack shut the door and came to sit down with us.

Raegan and I cried really hard together.

Finally after crying and hugging, we finally let go and he sat facing me. "J-Justin... what happened at that party?" He asked me as I let out a sob. I told them all everything.

Once I was done explaining the pain I had gone through the night prior and everything that had happened, we were all crying. I left out the fact that I cut myself though, I didn't want them to know that yet. I also left out the part of me planning my own suicide.

Raegan held me close. "Justin. I'm so so sorry... I promised I would be there for you and that I would protect you and I failed. I am so sorry." He sobbed and I did too. I sat up and looked at him, cupping one of his cheeks as I leaned in and kissed him. It wasn't just a peck.

The kiss was passionate and heart felt on both ends. Once it was done I leaned my forehead against his and he dried his tears. Raegan took his thumb and wiped my tears. "Justin. I love you. Will you be mine? I promise if you say yes that I will not let anything happen to you ever again and if it somehow does, I will stand by you and help you through it. We will fix it together. I promise. Will you?"

Raegan asked as I smiled and nodded. I kissed him and hugged him close as I let out a few shaky breaths. He rubbed my back and calmed me down. "It's okay... it's okay... I'm here. I will always be here. I promise." He told me as I rested my head on his shoulder and he held me close. We cuddled together and stopped crying.

I laid my head down on Raegan's lap as he ran his fingers through my hair and calmed me down. Kale took a picture and posted it as jack and him yelled "JAEGAN IS REAL!" At the same time making us all laugh.

My everything hurt from last night. I physically hurt all over and also emotionally hurt but Raegan made it all better.

Maybe I will rethink this whole killing myself thing... this week if he is able to show me that life is worth living if it's with him, then I won't.

I love Raegan Alexander Beast.

I will live for him.

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