A Timeless Place

Chapter 51 - Part I

"There comes a point where you no longer care if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. You're just sick of the tunnel." - Ranata Suzuki

Opened Cans of Undrunk Sodas

I walked back into the restaurant to where dad and Laurina sat. They were talking animatedly to each other and dad held her hand on his side of the table. There was something to natural to the way he held her hand. They looked like a real couple. Of course, they are a real couple now. When I approached them, they both looked up at me and smiled. This only hastened my desire to leave as soon as possible.

"Everything okay, Cath?" dad looked at me in concern.

"I'm really sorry but I don't feel too well," I apologised to them both in an attempt to dismiss myself.

"Oh no, what happened?" Laurina showed genuine worry, gesturing to the seat for me to sit.

I shrugged, not really in the mind-set of making up an excuse, "It's okay, I'd rather just go home and rest to be honest."

My chest tightened at the memory of Wes looking at me pleadingly. It made me breathless and my knees started to shake. I really wanted to get home as soon as possible.

"Okay, I'll see you at home," dad nodded with an odd look on his face. His eyes were glossed over and he didn't quite look me in the eye. I felt a twinge of guilt. I hope he didn't think I couldn't handle just a simple dinner with Laurina. Then again, I think he might be right.

I walked home in deafening silence- the events of the night swirling around in my head until I was dizzy. I didn't realise just how far the restaurant was from home so I walked and walked in the darkness with an endless path of my own thoughts and nothing to distract me. No books, no studying- just my raw thoughts and emotions. Laurina and dad- Mason and Wes- Wes and Renee. Too many factors. Too many emotions. When I focused on one, the memories and pain of the other pair pushed its way through.

When I reached home, the lights inside were already on. How was it possible that dad was already home? But his car wasn't in the driveway. My heart pounded. Was it Wes? He had access to my house before- it was difficult to swallow the reality of what had happened. Before the fight. And after everything, why was I so eager for him? I hated myself and despite this, my shaky hands impatiently opened the door and slipped inside quickly.

I heard footsteps coming to meet me and my heart pounded against my chest.

"Wes?" I said too quickly.

"Okay, I only gained two kilos," Eli said in mock defence, coming around the corner. "It's not like I gained a hunk load of muscles and testosterone."

"Oh, hey, Eli," My heart fell in disappointment. Yet, why should I have expected Wes when I had just turned my back on him. I breathed in deeply, willing the memories to go away, unsuccessfully, and walked into the kitchen, grabbing us both sodas.

"Kitty..." Eli took the soda from my hand and set hers down on the kitchen island.

"What's up, Eli?" I popped open the can. I was slowly starting to relax and I realised that her being here was far better than Wes. I was happy she was here, I really needed a familiar face after tonight.

"Where were you tonight?" she asked, looking fixatedly at the can on the kitchen island.

"Out with dad," I replied. My stomach twisted in guilt at leaving the second part out. I still didn't know why I hadn't told Eli. The night she had come over after the debacle with Wes and Rene and then dad, she had let me brood in silence, sitting with me as I went through movie after movie, pizza after pizza. The morning after when I had started to tell her what had happened with Wes, she had already gone through two stages of processing before I had even finished recounting the events. First it was disbelief and then scepticism. Then she quickly launched into a rant about Wes and was asking me a million questions that lasted for hours. By the end of that, I had forgotten to even tell her about what had happened with dad. Since then, I just didn't know how to bring up the topic. Or if there was a point to bring it up before anything was certain.