A Walk Down Autumn's Path

I'll Be There

I know what it is you're feeling. Empty, alone, unnoticed, anxious, impatient, scared, and unhappy.

You're feeling empty because no one has been there to fill you up. Only one person alone outside of your family has been there, and that makes you feel hurt. You don't feel full of love or happiness, you just feel devoid of all emotion. My dear, I will always be there. I will fill you with that emotion. I will do whatever it is I can to make you smile, to make you feel happy, and to make you feel full. You won't need any other, because I'll be there to be every other. I'll be there.

You're feeling alone because outside of us, you feel as though no one cares, or matters. You feel like though they seem to care when your worst has surfaced to a visible level, and you can't hold your emotions back, they don't actually take the time to get to know you and whether you have any damage hidden away inside. It doesn't matter what they make you feel, I will make you feel loved and surrounded, as long as you let me. I'll be there.

You're feeling unnoticed because you walk the halls day to day without any other character catching your low to the ground eyes. They won't come over and bump your shoulder just to say hi and see how you're doing. They won't notice this single girl in a mass of figures, no matter what she does. Autumn, that shouldn't matter. When I walk into a room, you're the first person I go to see. When I walk out of one, you're the first person I race to greet. You are always the first person I notice, and I will always be there to notice you. I'll be there.

You're feeling anxious about what the world holds in store for you when I'm not always around. You'll have two years where I can't walk you to class and hold your hand at the walls, so you've built an anxiety on that. Autumn, don't let it scare you. I'll see you as many times a week I can, I'll pick you up after class as many times a week I can, I'll call you every night, and I will text you every chance I can. I will help you through your last two years of school. I'll be there.

You're feeling impatient to get out of school and to kick off your life. You feel as though it's going too slow and that you're going to be there for what seems like an eternity. That is always what it seems your first two high school years, but before you know it you'll be applying for college. Time will start to fly, either this year's end or the beginning of the next. It doesn't matter how slow it seems for you, I'll always be there to speed it up, even when I can't be in school with you. I promise you, I will be there to keep your life going. I'll be there.

You're feeling scared of what the future holds in store for you. You fear the idea of being lonely, or homeless, or struggling; you fear the unsteadiness of not knowing what it holds. I will tell you right now, I know exactly what your future holds. You'll head off to college to study what you've had your heart set on, and you'll move into the same room as me. You'll start your first two years of college sharing the same bed, and that's the way I will finish my final two. After those last two years, I'll find a place to live close to where you're finishing school and I'll take you there and move you in. We'll live right under the same roof. You'll be here. I'll be there.

You're feeling unhappy because all these thoughts and feelings collide into one emotional mess, and it all piles up in your mind at once and you just can't hold it down. You're feeling emotionally overwhelmed and sad, and it's trying to suck you back into a depression. I will hold you up.

I'll be there to hold you when you need to be held. I'll be there for you to lean on when you need a shoulder to soak. I'll be there for you in your worst moments to keep the harsh and brash thoughts away. I'll be there to kiss you when you're just longing for the attention. I'll be there to notice you when no one else will. I'll be there to calm you when your feelings have overwhelmed you. I'll be there to soothe you when you're feeling scared or anxious. I'll always be there through every single thing you have to go through, and I will always do what I can to the best of my ability to hold you out of your depression, even if it were to mean slipping into my own for a while. It's worth it to keep you up, and I make you a whole-hearted promise with all of my being that I will always be there for you, when you need me most; even when you just need me a little.

"I'll be there."