23- vacation// therapy talk

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by littlelfreaks

by littlelfreaks

Y/n's point of view

Brendon left and went to do whatever he had to do. I feel fine I've felt okay I guess, I do have more anxiety but besides that that's all I guess. Lies, I'm just not feeling myself I mean I do but I'm not confident, I tell myself I'm ugly and fat and stuff- I don't the voices do. Tyler showed me a way to ignore the voices so I simply didn't tell anyone. I regret that now. My thoughts were interrupted when Brendon came back with everyone else.

When I say everyone was there I mean EVERYONE was there. No one said anything, they either looked at me or the machines I was hooked up to for no reason, or avoided looking at me completely- I can't blame them I'd do the same.

Brendon eventually walked over and sat in the chair next to my bed, I pulled st his hand and moved over on the bed motioning for him to lay down. He did and I kept our hands together and let my head fall onto his shoulder.

I missed this. It's been a few hours but being alone in a hospital bed makes me want to not be alone in a hospital bed? Someone say something. I can't stand this type of silence. I hate awkward silence.

"So y/n" Ryan said taking Brendon's previous seat.

Everyone had found a seat either by a chair near the bed or on the small couch they had in the corner. "Never mind we'll talk later.." Ryan added.

"Why not now?" I asked.

"Well I don't know if you want everyone to be here." Ryan said.

"I don't care soo tell me." I asked.

"The doctor suggested you go back in..counseling" ryan said cringing at my least favorite thing ever.

A/n- next few parts about counseling are from my personal experiences and opinions so yep.

"Haha nope,not going" I told ryan. Brendon and most of the others looked at me like I'm insane. "Okay story time then." I said. "Well I did counseling first year of highscool and the lady was a pure bitch. She blamed for for everything. She said it was my fault people hated me. She said if I dressed differently I wouldn't be hated, I said I'm not changing my clothing style and she said it's my fault people heated me then- so I made a promise to myself never to trust those people. Plus they only do it for the money." I added a bit quickly.

Brendon leaned down to my ear and whispered "you dressed amazing you looked hot and still do" he said playfully.

"I dress the same." I whispered back. He rolled his eyes playfully making me laugh, he kissed me quickly then I turned my attention back to ryan.

"Y/n you know I hate even suggesting you going but I think you should go" Ryan said nervously.

"And why is that?" I asked slightly annoyed.

"Because y/n you passed out from stress and no one knows why except you and that brain of yours." Ryan said getting annoyed back.

"Look I get your worried but I can't do that therapy crap again I'd rather just yell my feelings out the window" I said sarcastically.

Ryan sighed and rolled his eyes. "Y/n if you don't want to do therapy with a stranger then just talk to me." Tyler said.

I gave him a confused look. "Well since we all know I have my issues and I know how to deal with them, me and you can just do like a mini therapy type thing if you want." Tyler suggested.

"Okay I'll do it" I agreed not wanting to argue about actual therapy.

"Anyway when can I leave" I asked.

"Tomorrow morning" Ryan said.

"What why I'm fine in alive" I complained, hospitals are seriously boring.

"It's just to be sure y/n, it'll come sooner then later I promise." Ryan added.

I doubt it. We talked for a while then some pill they gave me made me all sleepy. Everyone except Brendon left back for the houses, they aren't far from here. I tried to tell Brendon he could leave but he wouldn't listen, we argued about it until I fell asleep- so he won.

A/n- so yes that story about therapy was my experience with it. Basically I was teased for many reasons and my counselor insisted it was my clothes- I dressed the same as everyone else but she didn't get that- she flat out said "well it's your fault no one likes you" so yea I left her and now I have. A better counselor.