Is there Truth in the Stars? (A Laurisa Cimorelli Fanfiction)

Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

It was Tuesday evening and I sat in the living room watching some TV when suddenly Lisa sat down next to me.

I looked at her confused and she smiled at me. I turned off the TV.

"Lauren, can I ask you something?"

"Depends on what it is" I said.

"Is it okay if we do something tomorrow?"

I narrowed my eyes.

"I can't" I said.

"But why?"

"Because."

"I know you don't feel good on Wednesdays. But I don't do ether."

"You don't feel good on Wednesday?"

"Yes. If you believe it or not."

"You don't have the right!"

"Oh wow. So now I can only feel something if I have the right to?"

"You didn't even apologize!"

"Yes! Because I can't! I am not sorry for what I did."

I looked at her shocked.

"And you're wondering why I don't want to spend the day with you?"

"You have to understand me, Lauren!" 

"Oh really? Everything is your fault! And you don't even regret it?"

"Regret what, Lauren?"

There were a thousand thoughts in my head. Things I wanted to say to her, things that hurt so damn much that I can't even get over them. But I just couldn't figure out how to say them. So I just opened my mouth and waited for some words. There weren't any. I wanted to leave but I felt Lisa grabbing my wrist.

"Please, Lauren. Stay."

"Why? Why should I stay?"

"Because I need you! And we should talk about things. I want to help you. Let us figure something out!"

"No! We can't! I don't want to talk to you ever again! You destroyed everything and you don't even realize what you did! It's a shame we live in here together because I can't wait for the day we don't have to see each other again! Seriously I can't wait! And as long as this day hasn't come you better not talk to me ever again! I mean it! I don't want to hear something. You go your way and I go mine. And that's final!" I screamed at her and while seeing how the tears run over her cheeks I felt mine welling up in my eyes. I turned around and left.

I wouldn't sleep in this room this night. I was really sure about it. I took a pillow and some sheets out of the huge closet in the hall and walked down to the couch. Thankfully it was quiet in the living room so I could lay down.

I couldn't really sleep that night and the short time I did fell asleep I had a really weird dream about Lisa sitting on the couch stroking through my hair and telling me how much she loved me. It felt so weirdly real that for a moment I thought about staying home. But then again it was Wednesday. And I couldn't stay home and pretend like everything was alright.

So I left the house at 4 am earlier than ever to walk to the library. This Wednesday felt like it would never pass. No book, no story could distract me from my thoughts. So I left the library at seven pm and walked through the mall a little. But still I felt so cold and lonely and as if everyone would look at me. So I actually went into a clothing store and went into the fitting room where I could be alone.

Maybe I wanted someone to be there, comforting me, holding me in their arms and telling me that it's okay. Maybe I wanted that person to be Lisa. But not after everything she did. I just wasn't ready to let pain in. I wanted to be okay. I wanted to finally feel good again. And not sad or hurt or broken. I wanted to be happy and enjoy life. I wanted things to be like they were only a few month ago. I want Lisa not being the one who destroyed everything. The person I looked up to so incredibly much ruined everything. I want my Lisa from before back. But she is gone. Forever gone. 

A/N Sorry for not updating in a long time. I was really busy. But I'll update a lot this week. Oh and sorry, this chapter isn't really good. I know. But you'll find out what happened really soon!!! :)  Thank you so much for reading! I hope you'll like this chapter!! :)