Smells Like Teen Spirit(kurt Cobain)

Who Knew

Ku: what so you mean?

Me: you know, I was not in love with you before the VMAs and while you were on that break and shit, till you made the Heart Shaped Box music video, but that's pretty much it.
I stayed silent while I looked for better words.

Me: lately...
He sat closer as I lowered my voice.

Me: I've been realizing a lot of stuff, opening my eyes and...changing. I think I'm growing up, Kurt. And you're not, you're only getting younger. And I love you for that Kurt, you helped me grow. As you said, being a teenager is not an age, it's a personality, and you'll forever be a teenager, and I thought I would too. I'm not saying I'm gonna grow into a fancy pants wearing, briefcase 9 to 5 woman, I'll probably have a youthful humor...but not with who I thought I would. Kurt we-  we healed each other. You saved me,, I saved you, but I guess that's what brought us together and now that we're totally two different people in that way. We're mentally healthy and happy. Then I don't think we are in love with each other anymore. I think we were more on love with the idea of us. I was in love with the idea of you being a rockstar, being extremely depressed as I, having problems with nearly everybody. I think you were in love with my innocence, with my naiveness, the fact that I was depressed as hell and loved music just as you did. You were my first love Kurt, and I had just turned 16. But now I'm 19 and..... a lot has changed and a lot has happened. I think I was more in love with you because I was afraid to lose you. But now, I have way more confidence about myself AND WITH YOU, and you're my friend more than ANYTHING else, along with being my first lover, my brother. I love you Kurt, and a lot, you don't even know. But I'm not IN love with you in that way. And I don't want you to take this as "we're better off as friends", I really, REALLY love you Kurt and I thank you and hell no this is not the end of anything, but I've been feeling different andI wanted you to know.

Those were the longest words of my life. Kurt just kept staring at me, with no expression at all. Then he finally showed something within his lips. I couldn't tell if it was a smile. For me it was a sympathetic smile.

Ku: I hate to see you grow up.
He said hoarsely. I beamed and hugged him. He hugged back. It was a tight hug, full of support. Like a brother's hug. Just what I needed.

1994

Wifey! Turn in the TV

Me: wifey? I'm your FI AN CÉ.
I said showing Dave my ring. He smiled and sat beside me at the couch. We watched MTV. Yeah, Dave was my fiancé. He had grown too, even though he was in love with me while we were both kids. When I'd escape to his house to rant about Kurt, I could hear it in his voice that he was also all grown up. I even grew up about the idea of no marrying. I'm marrying Dave now, and I want to marry him more than anything in the world. I love him a lot and we've been friends since forever. And I want to be with him the rest of forever.
I suddenly receive a call.

Me: Crystal Roberts.

Hey it's Kurt!

Me: wassup bro. No call since three days. What kind of brother are you?
I joked.

Ku: ha. I'm sorry it's just I've been dealing with some shit

Me: what shit?
I asked all concerned.

Ku: Dave's bachelor party
I laughed.

Ku: ha ha. Yeah. I want it to be the best man. After all he's being tied to YOU

Me: HEEY!
He laughed.

Me: well your beloved Caroline is planning mine and I bet it's better than yours.