Reasons

heartbreak

Cowering Carol watched as her only child was carried away in a body bag, whilst she wept in a ball on the floor unable to move due to her injuries hating life and herself. Wishing that Ed would have beaten her to death at least then she wouldn't have to feel this pain, uncontrollable heart breaking agony hurting more than Ed had ever done to her. Sophia was her lifeline the only thing keeping her going, keeping her heart beating, keeping her alive but that was gone now, as she roamed her eyes over the house looking at everyone in the house. Ed was standing there emotionless not caring which infuriated her, he felt nothing for his own daughter his own flesh and blood. Rick, Lori and Shane had joined the house when they saw the ambulance choosing to leave Carl at home thinking that it was Carol that was injured but it wasn't and when they saw that Lori burst into tears holding onto her husband as tightly as possible whilst he released his own tears. Shane looked horrified and was restraining himself from beating up the man that had caused his daughter to run across the road. Finally her eyes settled on Daryl, her Daryl standing in her living room about to breakdown over the loss of her daughter that he had tried so hard to save, he didn't cry he never cried but he felt deep. Why did he care so much? He barely knew Sophia, her girlish laugh, her smile that lit up the whole world, the way she woke up with a smile on her face, her energetic childish spirit and her whole essence. She remembered the day he broke her heart but it didn't hurt anywhere as much as this.

Wednesday. Carol hated Wednesdays, the days seemed to drag with the boring lessons and pointless dribble that was taught, but today felt weird as she collected her books from her locker. Turning she saw that Daryl wasn't there watching her instead there was just an empty space telling her why she felt weird and decided that he was late today. That theory was proven wrong as she walked into her first class to see Daryl already there, shrugging she joined him at his desk and pushed her spare pencil towards to him like she did everyday only to be rejected as he blanked her turning away. Pretending like this didn't bother her she listened carefully and took notes when needed. The day continued like this in every lesson they shared he ignored her hurting her cutting deep into her heart creating cracks, he wouldn't even look in her direction. At break he wasn't near her or even in the same room like he always was pleasing her friends as they joked about how he was over her which pushed the cracks even further, it was the same treatment at lunch causing Carol to run to the toilets as she watched her tears stain her face. At the end of the day she had cornered him demanding to know what she did wrong and why he was being so cold towards her. "It’s always about you isn't it, everything has to revolve around perfect little Carol well guess what it doesn't" Daryl screamed in her face making tears well up in her eyes as she continued to listen to his rant directed at her, "Smart little Carol spending Daddy's money your so selfish and plastic I only made friends with you so your friends would leave then I would ditch you leaving you a loner"  at this point her face was wet with her endless tears. Watching him walk away Carol felt her heart break into tiny pieces as she fell to the ground unable to stand any longer, she was falling in love with him and he hated her making her feel so naïve and small. Whilst he walked away the first of his tears spilt giving permission to the rest as he sped up not wanting her to see him cry feeling empty knowing that his heart was no longer there as it was back with the beautiful angel he had just broken.

That day was one of the clearest to remember as that was the reason why she had gotten together with Ed and ended up marrying him causing the death of her only love.

The next week Carol barely spoke or moved always staring straight ahead letting the days pass by without taking notice knowing that if she felt any emotion it would bring back the heartache  and pain relieving that moment. "Carol...." a voice spoke as they prodded her shoulder attempting to turn around. Looking at the origin of the voice she saw Ed and stared blankly at him signalling to him that she was already bored. "I know he broke you but I want to help fix you" he mumbled shyly bringing Carol out her coma like state as she smiled a small smile.

He tried to fix her. He thought he fixed her. He just put band aids over the wounds temporarily holding the broken object together but with every bit of abuse they were removed leaving her and empty shell once more until the day of her 12 week scan seeing her personal angel on the monitor.

Today was the day for her scan, still nervous she fidgeted in the waiting room annoying the crap out of Ed who tightly held her leg holding it in place leaving a mark. When they entered the room and prepared Carol she knew she would feel joyous at the picture of her baby but the feeling she felt sent her heart into overdrive as it healed and made her cry tears of happiness. Nothing could describe how she felt on that day; nothing would ever come close to the emotions that overwhelmed. Ed had a smile on his face as well bringing slight warmth to her heart as she knew he was excited by the aspect of having their own baby or as Carol referred to her as her own personal angel. Weeks after even months the feelings never passed or weakened the only grew.

That day was one of the happiest only being beat by the day Sophia was born. Tears still covering her face, she began to grow dizzy leading her to fall unconscious. All members in the house noticed once Daryl an over shouting at her to wake up and rushed over well all but Ed making the blood in Daryl's body boil.