When The Sun Sets

Your Words In My Veins

It's been a while now
since I was able to look you in the eyes.
It's been a while
since I was able to see you.
It was as if I was blinded, and you were just a shadow that I knew about, but could hardly see.
You're a ghost, yet you still take up most of my heart.
In my mind, you are always there, no matter what I do,
but there's nothing I can do to actually get you here.
The aches in my heart have gotten far too painful,
and the cries at night have given me too many head aches.
I'm trying so hard to stay strong, I thought I was strong,
but every day it gets clearer to me that this is too hard.
You're a beautiful soul, my love, you're a beautiful mind.
But, there is a darkness in your blood that is taking over and turning this around.
Your actions say more than the words that spill out of your mouth,
onto my skin and into my veins, creating a sense of nothingness.
It takes over my body and leaves me numb,
my mind doesn't work the way it used to.
I'm convinced that I could never feel again, I am convinced that love is overrated.
How am I suppose to pick myself up when I am so low?
I want what is best for you, for you are all I care about.
If what's best for you is for me to let you go,
then I cannot give you what's best, I must be selfish.
I don't want to be good, because I want you here.
Metaphorically, you are an angel who touched my heart and took it back with you when you went up.
There is a void in my chest, where my heart once was.
You are blinded,
when you don't see that
you are the hammer, while I am the nail.
Every hit is harder,
shoving me even further down, with every swing.
Despite this hurt, I am still here.
Seeing you part,
I love you more than ever, with whatever I have left.
I drag my feet because waking up gets harder everyday.
Ask me why I love you, ask my why I care so much.
Darling,
you're stubborn, a jerk,
but so hard to give up on.