Broken Inside (Read Description)

Chapter 14

*RAMONA'S POV*

We were all sitting in our room on the bed and the first thing Courtney did with her camera was take a picture of me. It wasn't bad considering I wasn't paying attention. She flashed a couple more and put the camera on the end table. She looked like she wanted something, but wouldn't say it. After a few more moments of silence I said, "What's on your mind, Courtney?"

"I was just wondering when you told her," she said.

"Uhm, I don't remember. Tanya, do you remember?"

"Yes, I do. It was the day after her parents... Well, you know. Courtney had been crying in your arms and she fell asleep on the couch. You came into the kitchen with tears in your eyes. I said, 'Ramona, what's wrong?'. You said, 'I need to tell someone. Can you keep a secret?'. You just came out and spilled your heart out to me. Then you made me swear that I wouldn't tell her or anyone and I didn't."

"Wow," Courtney said.

"Yup. She was the only one I ever told," I said.

"You know, speaking of your parents, how was your--"

I cut her off, "Tanya..."

"Oh. Okay. Are you going to see your mom?"

"I'll take her tomorrow and then we have to go home. These beds are getting uncomfortable," I laughed it off.

"I have to look her up," Courtney said. "I don't know where she is."

"Here," I said, handing her my lap top. She started typing in her mother's name. 

"No records. Damn it."

"Well I told you that your dad was taking care of her, remember?" Tanya said.

"Wait. There's a link here for a prison. Shhhh-- There's her." All three of us were staring at the picture. It was a mug shot and she seemed to be almost... Smiling? Like she was happy to be there? Wow. "Washington State Prison. All males. What the hell did she do?"

"It should say in the description."

"She raped and killed forty men and three teenagers. WHAT?!!!!!" Courtney was hot with rage. She started to get up and I threw my arms around her. "Let go."

"No. Never."

"Ramona, let go."

"No." She gave up and just sat back down. She sat silent for a minute then she looked at me and lunged herself at me. She was crying. Her body shuddered in my arms. I didn't know what to do, so I just held her. "We don't have to go."

"Yes, we do."

"Okay. What are the visiting times?"

"One to two and six to seven," she said slowly.

"We'll go at one. We have to get you home. I mean, we already missed graduation."

"That's right!"

"Yea."

"Damn it. Well, whatever. I don't even care."

"With all the stuff going on with us, they'll probably hold ours for us," I simply stated.

"They could." 

"Exactly. That's all we have to say."

"I just wanna get in the shower, okay? I don't wanna think about anything." I nodded at her and she stood and walked to her suit case. She pulled out a pair of pajamas and walked into the bathroom. Tanya left the room and I was sitting alone in the room. I drew my knees to my chest and put my head on them. I didn't know whether or not to cry. Why the hell would all of this happen?

*COURTNEY'S POV*

I let the water run over my face. Tears ran down my face just like this water did. I looked down and saw my razor. I picked it up. I looked down to my wrist and back to the razor. Slowly, I connected the two. I cut and cut and cut. My arms were covered. I started to get tired. I sat down and yelled, "Ramona!" In seconds She was in the bathroom. She moved the curtain and saw the bloodied water.

"Courtney, what the hell?!" She picked me up put of the water and set me down on the bed. She got me dressed and ran me out the door. We got in the car and she started driving to the hospital. I started to close my eyes and Ray said, "Baby, you have to stay awake. Come on, just stay awake." I went over on her side of the car and laid on her. I wrapped my arms around her. There was so much blood on her now. I don't really think she cared.

We reached the hopital and she carried me in to the emergency department and she set me in a wheel chair. She said something to the check out lady and I started to fall asleep. 

I woke up in a hospital bed with a heart monitor beeping. Ramona was holding my hand, sleeping. My arms were wrapped in bandages with blood spots on them. "Ray," I said faintly. Her head raised and she looked up at me. "Ray, I'm okay."

"You almost died, asshole."

"I know. I'm sorry, baby. I just..." I started to trail off. 

"It's okay. You're gonna be fine and that's all that matters." She put her head back down. "You're gonna be okay."

"When do I get out of here?"

"Tomorrow, around ten. We're going to see your mom tomorrow and you're gonna wear a hoodie. Not trying to be demanding but you want her to think you're doing fine with out her. It'll make her feel like crap."

"Okay. I love you, Ramona."

"I love you, too, stupid. Don't you ever do that again. Promise."

"I promise." I could tell that she was really upset. 

"Just go back to sleep. You're gonna need it."

"Kiss me goodnight." She stood and leaned over and kissed me on my forehead. "No, I want a real kiss." She started crying and kissed me. "Ramona, you're not gonna lose me. I promise."

"I know." She grasped my hand and sat back down and fell asleep. I stroked her hair reassuringly. "I love you, so much," I heard her whisper.

"I love you, too. And I'm sorry."

"It'll be okay."