Clara
Being separated from the only family you've ever know, it isn't easy. The void that remains, it makes you feel incomplete, like something's missing — someone. To feel whole again, to feel alive and wanted and loved. It takes time... I can't imagine what Kate is going through, what a five year old boy will go through when he no longer has his mother the only person he had ever known and loved. It pains me even more, that I will never be able to cease Sebastian's pain, only live with it with him. Until it pains a little less.
When I fall in love with Luca it felt like I no longer had my heart with me. It was with him, he is the one who showed me love, who made me feel alive and special. Not a day passes that I don't thank god for him. I am pregnant with his children, an unknown tale awaits for me. How can I wake up knowing that he won't be there to live in our little heaven we created together. "Clara," a low-husky voice called out my name, reaching my ears like a gentle breeze. I turn around and see him. Luca, hands in his pocket. Face, gloomy and inanimate. "We are leaving now. The vendettas have found our whereabouts," he spoke and walked away.
He doesn't look me in the eyes, I can't bare this feeling — two weeks of this torture. It breaks me, it makes my heart ache. My hand reaches out for him — lowly, my words failing to express my emotions. Why is he suddenly pushing me away? I go back inside the mansion and I see Sebastian with one of the bodyguards standing by the door. "Clara!" Sebastian ran to me, tears falling from his kind— dejected eyes. He hugged me, placing his head on my belly. "Mummy left." That's all he said and than continued crying. My heart felt heavy. Had she already told Sebastian that he will be staying with his father. Is she already gone... Luca called Sebastian to him.
"Let's go," he said, his arms wide open as if he were to hug him. Luca bent to pick him up and carried him. "It's going to be okay. Mummy just went away for a little while," he whispered.
"Mommy said you are my father," he said, looking right into Luca's eyes.
"Yes I am," he quickly replied, without hesitation. I walked behind him. The vendettas are still out there, plotting their revenge. It feels like we a happy ending is so out of reach.
We got in a black Range Rover, that was parked right out side the mansion. We got in, Sebastian sitting in the middle. No one spoke, just silence. The car ride was long, we drove upstate to the country side.The car stopped in front of a bungalow. "Charles drive and don't look back," he instructed the driver. The driver nodded — approvingly. We got out of the car and Luca carried Sebastian, he fall asleep during the drive. I looked around and admired the tranquility and the green scenery. The view is just beautiful. We got in the bungalow and the scent of vanilla welcomed me. I inhaled and exhaled, taking in the balmy air. I looked around the bungalow. Luca went to keep Sebastian in one of the rooms. The feeling in this house felt cozy and safe. The interior is epoch. They were antiques and frames but with no pictures in them. "You will be safe here," Luca said. I turn to look at him, he quickly looks away.
"Okay," I say in a low voice. "I should make something to eat. Sebastian will probably be hungry when he wakes up."
"No, you should rest. I'll take care of that," he spoke, walking away from me.
"Lucas," I said his name.
"Yes," he turned around and all it took was glimpse at his eyes to understand... I walked to him and hugged him. He started crying... soft sobs, barley audible. I have never seen him or heard him cry, and this is what broke me. Seeing him in tears for the very first time.
"I love you," I whispered, sure he wouldn't have heard it. He stopped hugging me and looked at me. His eyes puffy and nose, red.
"Clara I am leaving," he spoke in a gruff tone.
"What do you mean?" I asked confused. "You don't have to go to Jail. I need you... your children need you."
"The Vendettas want me to surrender my self to them. They promised me no more menaces to the Salvadors," he explained.
"There must be another way. How can you just give up like this? You never give up Lucas, you have guns don't you?" I spoke unaware of my speech. I let emotions take over...
"It's not as simple as that. Clara if I give my self in they will stop this rivalry against the Salvadors against our children and you. I can't just kill them all, there's always going to be that one that survives. That one who will seek justice through revenge," he said. I took a step back.
"What about us? Lucas I can't raise three children alone. If you leave I will have no one, the kids will never know their father. They need you..." He held me gently, cupping my face with one hand. Luca leaned down and kissed me. Soft, gentle and slow. Heavenly bliss...
He stopped kissing me and looked into my eyes. "Everything is going to be alright. You mi amor (my love), are strong and brave. You can handle whatever life throws at you. I was meant for you, and you were destined for me. Clara I'll find my way back to you. I'll come back to our family," he spoke in a silvery tone and kissed me on the cheek.
"When will you leave?"
"After I hold my children in my arms."
"What if they kill you?" I asked now tears streaming down my cheek.
"They don't want to kill me. They want something from me and I don't know what," he spoke to assure me. As if he knew my thoughts were consuming me. I decided to keep quiet, because I knew whatever I would say will make me sound selfish and unrelenting. It's not fair! Will Luca and I ever have some sort of ending? I just don't understand why he needs to surrender himself. But I love him... "I remember coming here for the first time with my mum, when I was nine. She made me promise not tell anyone about this place. I suppose my mum and I were running away from our bitter reality. We used to have movie nights and play all sorts of board games. Living a normal life. She bought this place using her own money, she'd saved. My mum loved telling me proverbs and she told me one about happiness, 'Misfortune makes happiness more sweet when it comes.' I never got it though I was a kid, it eventually became my sort of hope. Happiness was like a myth to me. When I saw you Clara, all those times of misery made sense," Luca spoke. I hugged him, it hurts me seeing him hurting. He is leaving the only thing that his ever wanted his whole life... True Happiness.
"Even if we can't find heaven. I am going to stand by you."
***
Thanks for reading.❤️
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