ANXIETY 2 *NoLoveHere* [COMPLETED]

«Pamela»

What the Hell Is Wrong With My Children?? All Of Them ?? I Finally Calmed Down Enough & Called Krissy! I Was thinking Me & James Needed To Stand Back For A While Too. She Answered the Phone Saying , "Look , I Know You & James Are Upset , but I Didn't Mean For them To Get In this. I Swear"! I Was Silent For A Second , Her Voice Already Seemed A lil Shakey , I Didn't Wanna Yell. I Finally Said "Krissy , Your My Daughter & I love You , I Love You So Much that It hurts & As Much As I love You...I love Krystal & Aaron the Same Way. I Don't Want None Of Y'all In Harms Way like This.  You Can Move Here With Us For A Little While If You Want." It Was Quiet On the Phone. It Was Like She Was Thinking About It. I Said "Hello"? She Finally Said "No , ThAnk You"! & Hung Up the Phone. Lord , Lord , Lord , What Am I Gonna Do With these Kids?
James Was Gone fishing With A Few Friends & Aaron , Krystal & Me Sat In the Front Room Together Silently. I Finally broke the Silence Saying , "So What Happened"? Aaron Said "Moma , We Don't Wanna talk About that. We told You What Happened"! "Well , Tell Me Again"! Krystal Rolled Her Eyes & Got Up finna Walk Off , but I Said "Sit It Back Down"! She Said "Mom Do You Really think We Wanna Talk About What Happened Over & Over Again"? "Your Alive To Tell the Story , So tell It"! Aaron Said "Really Ma"? I Yelled "Really"!!! Krystal Said "Like We been Told You , Krissy Was Finna Be Dead , If They Didn't Give A Name On Who Killed the Guy. They Probably Would've All Got Killed Anyway & Aaron Decided To help." He Jumped In Saying "And It Was Alot Of Them Dudes & One Woman. I Just Felt like I had To Help"! I Said "You Should've Never Been Touching Your fathers Weapons Anyway"! "Ma , If I Didn't Go Back , Krissy Would More Than likely be Dead Right Now As We Speak!! I Was her Only Help , All Her friends Were Finna Go Down With Her. You Wanted Krissy & Your Unborn Grandchild To Die?? Hell Naww You Didn't , Especially If You're Still tryna Make Things Right With Her. You Would Be Sitting here Crying Your Eyes Out Right Now If Me , Aaron NaShawn Jones Did Not Go Back & You Wanna Sit Here & Be Mad At Me"?? "Watch Your lips Son!! I'm Not Mad Ok , I'm Disappointed"! "Disappointed In Who?? Yourself?? You Should Be!! Maybe If You Raised Krissy like You Raised Us Instead Of letting the Streets Do it , This Wouldn't be Happening"! My Heart Dropped When My Son Said that To Me. Krystal's Mouth Fell Open. She Looked At Me In Shock. Aaron Finally Realized He Went To Far & Said "Ma , I Didn't Try to"- I Cut Him Off , by throwing Up The Hand. Got Up , looked At The Both Of them & Walked Out The House , Got In My Car & Left.

I Was Sitting At the Park Still thinking About What Aaron Said. My Heart Was Broken Right Now. Those Were Harsh Words , Like Has He & Krystal Always Felt like That?? I Need Answers!! Is All Of this Really Me & James fault?? I'm A terrible Mother!! My Phone Began To Ring. I Wiped the Tears Off My Face & Sucked the Snot Back Up That Was Coming Out. I looked At My Phone & It Was Krissy.
"Hello"? "After the Funeral Nxt Week Sometime , I'll be there" "Whose funeral"? "See You then. Talk To You Later Ms.Pamela"! "No Wait" *Click*! She Had Already Hung Up. Krissy Living With Us ? It Was Exciting , but Also Kinda Weird. James Pulled Up In His Truck & Got Out ! I Said "What Are You Doing Here? How'd You Know I Was here? I Didn't Tell Anyone." He Laughed & Said "I've Been Knew , the Park Is Where You Go To Let Out All Your tears & Just Sit & Think. When We Use To Get Into it & You Would Leave Everytime I Didn't think None Of It till Maybe The 3rd time. I thought You Were having An Affair & I Came Pass the Park & Seen You Just Sitting On the Bench. I Never Said Anything. I let You Chill & Come Home When You Were Ok. Of Course I had To Come By Like 2 Or 3 times After to Make Sure I Knew , Ok Yea She Just Needs Air"! We both Laughed , Me Not So Much , but It Made Me feel A Little Better. I Said "So What Made You Actually Come Over Here In Your fishing Clothes Letting Me know You Know My Secret Hiding Spot ? Well What I Thought Was A Secret Hiding Spot"? He Laughed & Said "I Came Home to Take A Shower & Skin the Fish Until I heard  What Aaron Said To You Earlier"! "Who told You ? Krystal"? "Nope. He Did. He Said He feels terrible About What He Said , It's Just You Kept Reminding Him Of What He Did & He Was Just tryna Protect Everybody. He Was Still Wrong & I Got On His Ass , but This Is Alot For Krystal & Aaron. Their trying."! I Rolled My Eyes & Said "Yea , Whatever. He Really hurt My feelings"! He breathed In & Out & Said "Pam , We Done Made Too Many Mistakes. When We First Met Krissy , It Was Chaos Going On. Did You Really think Bringing Her Back Into Our lives Everything Was Gonna Go Perfectly? Everyone's Gonna fall Out , Until We All Just Really Understand Eachother"! "You're Right. You Are So Right"! He Kissed My Forehead & Said "Now Come On , back To the House. I Smell like Fish & I Don't Wanna Smell like it , I Just Wanna Cook it & Eat it." We both Laughed & I Said "Ok. Let's Go."!
We Were All Sitting at the Table Quietly , Including Kim & It Was Silent. I Could Tell Kim Was Feeling Uncomfortable , So I broke the Silence & Said "Y'all I have An Announcement"! Everyone looked At Me. No One Said Anything..Just looked , Waiting! I Said "Krissy Is Moving In With Us , Next Week"! Everyone Just Looked from Me , To Eachother. James Said "Wow! Moving In huh"? I Said "Yes"!