I left Lance’s hotel room in a daze, so much was flowing through my mind. What was I doing with Lance? What am I doing with Chris? What was I going to tell Chris tonight? I hopped in my car and headed back towards my apartment, I had precisely two hours before seeing Chris and I was torn.
When I got to the apartment I saw a beautiful bouquet of white calla lilies sitting on the dining room table. I walked over and saw a small card with my name on it. When I opened the card it read: I’M ALWAYS THINKING OF YOU, HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY BEAUTIFUL. I LOVE YOU! I turned the card over but there was no name. Great, I wasn’t sure who the flowers were from. I sighed and headed upstairs to take a shower. I spent over 30 minutes in the shower contemplating what I was going to say to Chris tonight.
I dressed in teal sweatpants and a white tank top. I placed my hair in a high ponytail and grabbed my keys. The drive to Chris’s place was only about 10 minutes but the closer I got, the more anxious I became. I knocked on the door and Chris opened wearing nothing but a towel which hung low on his hips. His amazing chest glistened with small drops of water and he smelled of so good! “Um hey” I said. He leaned down and placed a small kiss on my cheeks “hey baby come in, I just got out the shower.” I stepped in and walked to the couch “Ok I’ll wait here till you get changed” I said placing my purse down and sitting on the couch. “Ok give me two minutes” he smiled and walked into his bedroom.
Chris returned a few minutes later with gym shorts and a tank top, well at least I could focus now that he wasn’t half naked. “Hey” I said as he took a seat next to me. He smiled and kissed me, slow at first then more aggressively. He slipped his tongue into my mouth and pulled my body closer to his, he moaned as he slightly bit my bottom lip. “Chris” I mumbled against his mouth, he kept kissing me. After a few more seconds of this, I slowly pushed him off. He frowned “Sorry babe but I feel like I haven’t seen you in weeks.” “I know, I’m sorry, a lots been going on” I said looking down at my hands, “Kendra talk to me” he said lifting my chin so that my eyes met his. “Nothing to talk about” I said turning my head. “Well I have something to say” he said sounding serious. I already knew what was coming, Chris knew something was up, I’ve been neglecting him and he was going to break up with me. I sighed “Look Chris I’m sorry, I know I’ve been a horrible girlfriend lately and I completely get it if want to break up.” “Wait what?” he said lifting an eyebrow “Aw baby no, I don’t want to break up with you.” “But…” I started but he cut me off “listen to me babe, I love you.” “Chris…” “No Kendra just listen. I’m not telling you I love you for you to say it back. I mean I hope one day you do but I’m not rushing you. Every relationship goes through hardships babe but you don’t just give up on someone you love. I know you have something going on but I want you to know that I’m here, I’ll give you whatever time you need to work it out and when you’re ready to tell me about it I’ll be here. Babe I want you to trust me, I want to be there for you.”
I have never felt so guilty in my life, tears streamed down my face “Chris I am so sorry, I’m a horrible girlfriend” I said sobbing. “Baby don’t cry it’s ok” he said pulling me into his chest. “But you don’t even know what I’m referring to” I said looking up at him. “I don’t care. I told you I trust you and I love you.” I can’t believe that I have such an amazing guy who was willing to do anything for me and I was hurting him like this. I needed to end things with Lance, I just can’t keep hurting Chris like this, he deserved better. He deserved a faithful, committed girlfriend. Chris held me tight as if his life depended on it and it felt right, this was where I belonged in Chris’s arm not Lance’s bed. “Chris?” I said after a few minutes “Hmm yes babe?” “I love you too” I said. He pulled away and looked into my eyes “Kendra you don’t have to…” “No I placed a finger over his mouth, I’m not just saying it to say it. I love being with you, I love how safe I feel in your arms. I love how you trust me no matter what and how you always try and make me happy. I love you.” He smiled then pulled me to him again and started kissing me and this time I was the one who was hungry for his kisses.
“I have to go babe” I said a few hours later. Chris and I sat on that couch for almost 4 hours, we talked, we laughed, we kissed, we were a couple again. “Damn it is getting late, ok come on I’ll walk you out” he said grabbing my hand and pulling me up from the couch. I grabbed my bag and we walked towards my car, “Thanks for coming baby” he said. I smiled “Nowhere else I’d rather be.” I reached up and kissed him again. “Oh did you like them?” he asked as I opened the door. “Hmm?” I looked confused. He laughed “The flowers baby, you said calla lilies were your favorite.” I smiled hugely “They are and I loved them. Thanks baby!” After a few more kisses, I finally left Chris’s and headed home.
I walked into my room and flopped on my bed, I was so exhausted but also relieved. As I started to doze off, I heard my phone chime. I sighed and clicked open the privacy message from Lance, “Hey baby I miss you so much already.” I smiled then frowned. “We need to talk.” I hit send and fell into a world of unconsciousness.
